Girl Scouts Thin Mints

Marvo Reviews

Thin Mints

I learned a very important lesson this weekend: Don’t try to haggle with Girl Scouts, because they won’t budge.

Yesterday, while I was walking out of the national grocery store chain I shop at, out of nowhere three Girl Scouts appeared in front of my shopping cart. Fortunately, I have cat-like reflexes and I swerved the cart to avoid hitting them.

I looked at them and they all smiled and said a synchronized, “Would you like to buy some Girl Scout Cookies?”

Usually I would avoid such fundraising efforts because I’m a really cheap bastard. However, it’s been a few years since I had Girl Scout Cookies and I wondered if there were any new flavors. So I asked the three of them, “What flavors do you have?”

They went through the list and it sounded like they were the same old flavors. I sighed and then asked them if they had any new flavors. This seemed to have stumped them because they began whispering to each other. After a few moments, they came to the consensus that there weren’t any and they shook their heads.

After the quick disappointment wore off, I said to them, “You Girl Scouts just changed the look of your uniforms, isn’t it about time you girls changed the flavors of your cookies?”

The three of them began whispering to each other again. After a few moments, I think they came to the consensus that I’m a big, yucky dork.

Since they didn’t have any new flavors, I decided to get a box of Thin Mints. One of the girls told me they’re the most popular Girl Scout Cookies. After telling me that wonderful nugget of information that might come in handy during a game of Trivial Pursuit, I said to the girl, “Well I think if you had a chocolate chip cookie it would totally kick Thin Mints’ ass.”

After our little banter, I asked the three girls how much the box of Thin Mints was.

“Four dollars,” they said with smiles.

“Four dollars!” I said with disbelief.

I could’ve sworn the last time I bought Girl Scout Cookies they were only three dollars, so I decided to haggle.

“How about three dollars for the cookies?” I asked them.

“Four dollars,” they said.

“$3.50?”

“Four dollars.”

“$3.75?”

I was going to start raising my offer in one cent increments, but all three of them had stern and bitchy looks on their faces, like their inner Omorosa’s were coming out. So I paid my four dollars and pushed my cart away before they could use what they learned to earn their Self-Defense Girl Scout Badges.

When I got home, I opened the Thin Mints and began popping them one-by-one as I watched the Pittsburgh Steelers get whipped by the New England Patriots. Before I knew it, I ate half the box.

I’m usually not big on mint, except when it’s in my toothpaste and chewing gum, but I like Thin Mints. They have a nice chocolate and mint mixture, which make them refreshing and satisfying. I would definitely buy more if they lowered the price a little.

Damn greedy Girl Scouts!

No wonder their uniforms are green.

Item: Girl Scouts Thin Mints
Purchase Price: $4.00
Rating: 4 out of 5
Pros: No tax. Nice chocolate and mint mix. Helps young women become happy and resourceful citizens.
Cons: No new Girl Scout Cookie flavors. Damn greedy Girl Scouts.

29 thoughts to “Girl Scouts Thin Mints”

  1. I read your blog daily, and I DIED in the middle of Starbucks reading this. People are seriously giving me weird looks as I sit here and type away on my laptop.

    ANYWAY – you’re way right about both the flavors and the price. Jeez. For twenty-four cookies (or however many there are in a box), you’d think they’d rethink their marketting strategy, eh?

    Just remember, girl scouts are still pint-sized and you can still kick them across the grocery store parking lot like little punter dogs.

    Cheers!

  2. Here in the land of the SuperBowl Champion New England Patriots those cookies only cost $3.50. Of course the girl scouts are presently buried up to their eyeballs in snow and we have no hope of obtaining the thin mints.

  4. *sigh* You HAD to bring that up didnt you? Its ok tho, at least we got beat by the Champs and we’ll get some Monday Night games next year… *Pouts off slowly with her WARD jersey on* 🙁

  5. I prefer my Thin Mints from the freezer, a nice twist.

    I think there has to be Afghan poppy in the ingredients to make them so fargin’ addictive. I can do a box in short order.

  7. To a certain extent I think they can determine the price. Here’s the real kicker, there are different flavors. Apparently they vary according to the region. I don’t know who in the troops gets to pick but that must be a powerful position. Go to http://www.girlscoutcookiesabc.com/atc/
    to see what they are hiding from us! It’s worse than I thought, go to http://www.littlebrowniebakers.com/cookies/cookies.html for recipes that use girl scout cookies. Quite the empire.

  8. The price is the main reason I don’t buy them anymore. $4.00 is too much for so little cookie. I now by the Mother’s brand. They taste exactly the same and are cheeper. They sometimes even go on sale and that is just as good as hagling!

  9. you should also try the samoas.
    and can i make review requests? 7up plus and the mushroom and swiss quarter pounder at McDs.

  10. Claire – No, I’m a total wuss. The three of them could totally kick my ass. One swift kick to the family jewels and I’ll go down hard.

    jenny – $3.50! See this is what happens when you live in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, gas is $2.35 a gallon and Girl Scout Cookies are $4.00.

    Allison – Oh man, you’ve totally given me a bargaining chip. I can say, “Well this woman who reads my blog said she bought hers for $3.00. Why can’t you sell it to me for $3.00?”

    Aymie – Sorry, there’s always next year.

    UncleHornHead – Freezing them? Why didn’t I think of that? Well it looks like the other half of the Thin Mints are going into the freezer.

    Suzanne – Yes, several products have. But recently, there haven’t been any, because I’ve become Scrooge-like.

    alisa – It’s like Microsoft, except crunchier and sweeter.

    srmc – I like to think that the $4.00 is helping these young women stay off the pipe and the pole.

    LPS – I believe I reviewed 7up plus several months ago. It’s the pink one, right? As for the mushroom and swiss quarter pounder, it sounds kind of nasty, but that’s the way I like it.

  11. That was hilarious! Next time you have to put a warning on the post, “Do not read while at work, they will know you aren’t working”…lol. Those girl scouts are straight up husslers with their adorable smiles.

  12. Aghahah. That was my best Homer Simpson sound.

    Thin mints are the best. Mix them with the peanut butter flavor and it is rocking to the max. But they are only three bucks around here.

  13. I LOVE Thin Mints. LOVE them. Did I mention I love them? When they ran out of them here I actually ordered them from a friend across country. Yes, my name is Grins and I’m a Thin Mint addict. Luckily the freeze and I can sometimes manage to forget they are there.

  14. I’m getting my thin mints for $3 here in Texas.

    A mushroom, swiss quarter pounder? I can’t believe you have those. We don’t have those down here. *pout* I love mushroom swiss burgers.

  16. Oh one more thing. I was told I’m not getting my order until two weeks from now. What’s up with that? You can use my $3 for haggling, because I’m calling my contact tomorrow and asking what’s up. I mean if you already have thin mints on the islands why can’t I have them!

  17. I remember one night, when I was about 13 or 14, I polished off half a box of Thin Mints. Everything thing was fine until around 3 in the morning, when I (under the throes of previously dormant stomach virus) began to throw up everything I ate in the last 36 hours, and the Thin Mints were up first. The taste of mint and chocolate, combined with the already rancid pizza-and-orange juice taste of your standard vomit was not unlike my mouth being raped.

    I never ate Thin Mints again. The moral of the story? Screw Girl Scouts.

  18. Stacey – If I did put a warning, I would have to put it on EVERY post, because every post is funny. Okay, not really. Only 1 out of every 8 are actually any good.

    Lou – Mmm…Thin Mints and peanut butter. I tried it and it actually tastes pretty good. Nice suggestion.

    Grins – Hi Grins, I’m here for your intervention.

    laanba – Um…But it’s a MCDONALD’S mushroom and swiss quarter pounder. If anyone will ruin one, it would be McDonald’s.

    Goldberry – That’s just my life I guess, to be forever outwitted by girls. Damn, their sugar, spice, and everything nice!

    laanba – Wow, I guess Thin Mints are really popular. Or they’re building demand for them, so they can jack the price because of it’s popularity. Oh, those sneaky Girl Scouts.

    Chris Velazco – Oh there’s nothing like mint vomit. The mint slightly intensifies the burn of the vomit.

  19. mmmm, thin mints ARE good!!

    but $4? I was already warned that my little cousins are going to be hitting me up to buy some cookies from them this weekend. Better get started on that loan.

  20. Webmiztris – Eh, you probably won’t have to pay $4. It seems like EVERYONE else hasn’t paid $4.

  23. Krista – Go with Jenny and buy yourself some Thin Mints, everything will be alright.

    Jenny – Go take Krista and get her some Thin Mints.

  24. I heard on the radio this morning that Samoas, have a new name, Caramel Delights, I think Samoans took offense, damn politically correct world, is nothing Sacred?

  25. I suppose we’re just splitting hairs here, but it’s Omorosa, though I do hate legimitizing her by pointing that out. Also, I got mine for 3.50/box, but that’s because I have a source deep within Girl Scouts corperate. The only downside — greatly reduced ‘awwww cute’ factor when not buying from real girls.

  26. Matt – Knowing many Samoans, I definitely wouldn’t want to offend them, because they could kick my ass.

    Travis – You say Omorosa, I say Amarosa. You say tomato, I say tomatah. Let’s call the whole thing off. (Sorry to the young kids for the old time reference).

  28. I only buy Girl Scout cookies as a TAX-FREE DONATION. That’s right folks, a portion of what you pay for them can be written off. With that said, I like the generic “thin mints” I buy at Safeway. They’re bigger, thicker and waaaay cheaper.

  29. sapere aude – The new Girl Scout motto: Taking over the country one box of cookies at a time.

    Anne-Marie – Too bad I don’t eat enough of them to make it worthwhile to list on my taxes.

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