(Editor’s Note: I’d like to thank all of those who sent me well wishes these past couple of days. I’m feeling better thanks to lots of orange juice, Airborne Effervescent, green tea, generic NyQuil, water, quality time with my bed, and apologies to Dr. Phil.)
A few weeks ago Impulsive Buy reader Editrix told me about Honey Graham Life Cereal, which she learned about from the ad in the back of a Cinnamon Life Cereal box. According to Editrix, the box said Honey Graham Life is, “the newest and most surprising Life cereal yet!â€
Being someone who likes surprises, except the surprise of finding out the female prostitute I hired has both sexual organs, I had to find out what was so surprising about Honey Graham Life Cereal.
After eating the entire box, I have found there are three things that are surprising about it.
What’s the first thing that’s surprising about Honey Graham Life Cereal?
Mikey likes it, and he doesn’t like anything. However, if you think about and look at the other things Mikey likes, him liking Life Cereal isn’t so surprising.
For example, Mikey’s favorite board game is The Game of Life. His favorite soap opera is One Life To Live. His favorite TV show of all time is The Facts of Life. He also likes reading Life Magazine. Finally, young Mikey also likes to chug down a 40-ounce of Miller High Life Beer.
What’s the second thing that’s surprising about Honey Graham Life Cereal?
Despite looking almost exactly alike, it turns out that Life Cereal and Chex Cereal are in no way related.
Although I have my suspicions that Mr. Quaker and General Mills had the same cereal concubine and had several milky wet threesomes with each other, which probably led to the births of Life Cereal and Chex Cereal.
What’s the third thing that’s surprising about Honey Graham Life Cereal?
Honey Graham Life Cereal didn’t taste like honey or graham. Instead it tasted like some kind of sweet vegetable, although I can’t point out which one.
However, that sweet vegetable taste was surprisingly decent, but still too weird for me to consider buying another box of Honey Graham Life Cereal.
Item: Honey Graham Life Cereal
Purchase Price: $5.99
Rating: 2.5 out of 5
Pros: Big box (21 ounces). Made with whole grain for my fat ass. Low-fat. Vitamins and minerals. Mikey likes it.
Cons: Weird sweet vegetable taste. Gets soggy quick. Life and Chex are not related (or are they?).