Over the years, I have found that many good things come in small packages, like chewing gum, marshmallows, my iPod, eggs, and Danny DeVito.
Unfortunately, I recently came across something that came in a small package, but wasn’t very good.
No, it wasn’t the movie Daddy Day Care for the Playstation Portable. It was the Ito En Sencha Shot.
In Japanese, “cha” means tea. As for “sen,” I don’t know what it means in Japanese off the top of my head, but to my friends with the munchies and glassy eyes, it means they’ll be twenty dollars poorer and maybe a little late to work.
Although, Sencha Shot does sound like something a little less messy than a bukkake. (Yes! Finally! I have used the word “bukkake” in a review!)
(Warning: The link above may contain stuff that is NSFW.)
Anyway, the Sencha Shot is basically Japanese green tea in a can.
For those of you who aren’t familiar with green tea, it’s a wonderful source of antioxidants, which are used to get rid of harmful free radicals in our body.
According to the can, it contains 152 milligrams of catechin tea antioxidants.
That amount may look impressive, but it’s not as impressive as the names of the individual antioxidants — epicatechin, epicatechingallate, epigallocatechin, and epigallocatechingallate — which are not only long, but also words that may make National Spelling Bee Championship competitors either faint, cry, or pee in their pants.
Instead of a lot of long words I can’t spell or pronounce, I wish the Sencha Shot contained a lot of short words that I could pronounce and a decent flavor. It was cold and slightly bitter, just like the Japanese green tea that sat in my cup for hours because my blind date didn’t show up at the Japanese restaurant we were supposed meet at.
Fortunately, there wasn’t much Sencha Shot to drink, because the small can held only 6.4 ounces.
Surprisingly, the hardest thing about the Sencha Shot was not spelling bee championship-type names of the antioxidants, it was the can itself. I found out the hard way that the can was impossible to crush on my forehead, because it’s made out of steel.
Actually, I found out the hard way a few times, because I didn’t realize slamming a steel can on my forehead would mess with my short-term memory. After slamming my forehead with the steel can the first time, I quickly forgot about it and attempted to crush the steel can on my forehead again…and again…and again.
The next day, I woke up with a red ring on my forehead and could no longer recall the lyrics of Gerardo’s “Rico Suave.”
Item: Ito En Sencha Shot
Purchase Price: $1.49 (6.4 ounces)
Rating: 2 out of 5
Pros: High in catechin tea antioxidants. High in Vitamin C. No calories or fat. Finally got to use the word “bukkake” in a review. I no longer know the lyrics to “Rico Suave.”
Cons: Tastes like the cold green tea that I can get from waiting around for a blind date at a Japanese restaurant. Wee little can. Can is impossible to crush on forehead because it is made out of steel. Antioxidant names are hard to spell and pronounce.
So they want you to drink a healthy tea but don’t put it in an environmentally friendly recycleable can? Those wacky tea manufacturers.
“bukkake. (Yes! Finally! I have used the word “bukkake†in a review!)”
Had no idea what bukkake was until I clicked on the link… not sure if I should thank you or not??
Will thank you for another humorous review! 🙂
I’m not sure you should be PROUD of finally being able to use “bukkake” in a review . . .
lol, Rico Suave. Now I’m going to have that song stuck in my head.
Chuck – Maybe those antioxidants are so powerful that mere aluminum cannot contain their power.
Ayesha97 – Just consider yourself cultured. 😉
Pel – But I am proud. I’ve been wanting to use that word for a long time, but just couldn’t find the perfect review to use it in. Now that bukkake is gone, the next word I want to use is “nutcracker.”
Jen – I’m sorry I put that song in your head. Fortunately for me, I can’t remember any of the lyrics, so it can never be stuck in my head.
I had a freind in high school who, we think, did drugs at lunch one day and attempted repeatedly to crush a can on his head. He walked around with a ring bruise on his forehead for a week afterwards. Hope you heal faster.
Did you gukkun when you drank?
oh my gosh, you are so good at dredging up dormant memories (like ladies in white for special k)… i think the tune of “rico… suave” are drifting back to me….!
i’ve noticed that about the japanese drinks cans are much sturdier, more like the cans used to house corn niblets. i have never checked and wonder if they are recycleable….
Bukkake is a very interesting word. It’s amazing how the japanese use their imagination.
No thanks, I’ll take my antioxidants in something I CAN pronounce! 😉
$1.49 for 6.4 ounces? Ouch! I think you could grown your own tea for that price and get a lot more than 6.4 ounces.
mmmm, I love green tea, but I’d never pay that much for it. if I’m going to spend that much moolah on a drink, I better be able to get buzzed off of it. 🙂
I used to love green tea. It was my study-for-finals-food. Then I went to the school of Ed. I don’t know what it says that I no longer need things to help me study to TEACH.
I can’t believe you used the b- word in your review. Naughty, naughty.
I realize I’m base and unsophisticated, but having been raised since I was 5 on Lipton Tea, Green tea is somewhat tasteless and uninteresting to me. Anyway, just as I don’t see the need for Green tea, I similarly don’t see the need for bukkake OR Rico Suave. That means I’m uncultured I suppose.
I think it’s supposed to be DeVito not DiVito
anyway, congrats on using bukkake and good luck with nutcracker
another fun thing to try to do is to pretend that you are Linda Blair in the Exorcist while having sex. good times.
Again we match.
Both with green tea.
We should get married, isn’t that legal over there on your island?
Chuck said:
“So they want you to drink a healthy tea but don’t put it in an environmentally friendly recycleable can?”
Heh. When have the Japanese EVER been concerned about recycling? This is the same society that wraps individual pieces of candy/pastries, which go inside a prettily wrapped box, which is then ensconced in a paper sleeve.
No offense Marvo.
Amy in GA – There are three things that can cause a person to crush a can on their head: Drugs, alcohol, and lack of brain cells from crushing cans on one’s head. BTW, what’s “gukkun?”
wyn – I’ve been trying to get a Color Me Badd reference into a review, so what out for that.
Lucy – Japanese men from Japan are very sukebe.
nat – …and in something not as expensive.
rfduck – Even better. I can get sixteen green tea bags for $1.25, brew the tea, chill it, and do a Lipton tea plunge into a pool. Oh wait, you might be too young to remember the Lipton tea plunge.
Webmiztris – If you can find a drink that can get me buzzed for only $1.49, please tell me about it, unless it’s moonshine. 🙂
theinfamousj – I’ve be dying to use that word. Since I’ve used it once, I think you’ll see it more often. Although I wonder how many Google searchers will be led here because I used it.
Genny from the Burbs – We definitely don’t need Rico Suave.
caitlin – You’re right. It is supposed to be DeVito. Thanks for pointing that out. 🙂 Oh, if only I could turn my head around 360 degrees.
Lord Jezo – So what are you wearing tomorrow? I’ll probably wear one of my Threadless t-shirts and some cargo pants. Just to let you know, it isn’t legal here.
Toni – Hey! Dems fighting words! Did you know that Japan is one of the best recycling countries in the world? Did you also know that Japan is one of the kinkiest countries in the world? When you put those two together, you get female robots made out of recycled products that could spank me. 😉
Hey Marvo, I thought it was the Nestea plunge, not Lipton.
Chuck – Dammit! You’re right! Damn you antioxidants!
🙁 I hope that blind date that stood you up is happy– she’s missin’ out on one wild and crazy, awesome guy!
I’d never to that to poor marvo.. You’re too awesome.
and kudos on using Danny DeVito, iPod, and bukkake in one product review! I tip my hat to you, good sir!
Marvo- for real? Japan is one of the best recycling countries in the world? Hmmm….well, when I lived in Japan for a while, I had to sort my garbage every week, but I thought it was so that the garbage men would have an easier time burning them.
How can Japan be one of the best recycling countries in the world when the air is so heavily polluted (at least, around Tokyo)? One of my friends and one of my ex-students suffered from awful skin problems caused by the pollution. Their skin looks so red and raw, and they were always sick. It was so bad that both of them have been hospitalized several times.
KT – Thanks for your kind words! Danny DeVito, iPod, and bukkake in one review? That’s nothing. Someday, I’ll stick Whoopi Goldberg, iPod nano, and tekoki in the same review.
Toni – I could’ve sworn I read somewhere that Japan has a great recycling program. Maybe it was just cans and plastic bottles. Damn you Google! 🙂
I love Japanese packaging. It makes it all look sooooo pretty. Of course, that is the point.
However, Toni, sometimes you are supposed to eat the paper wrappings on the individual candies. They are paper candy after all. Trying to unwrap them would be a nightmare.
theinfamousj – I love Japanese packaging too, but sometimes it’s overdone. I’ve had a few products that had more layers on it than a weatherman walking through a snow storm.
To be fair, I think that one of the reasons that individual candies/pastries are wrapped is because you’re supposed to give them out as omiyage (souvenirs/gifts) for your co-workers, and it’s more sanitary to hand out individually wrapped items than giving each person a naked chocolate ball using your grubby paws.
You know what’s really funny about Japan and packaging? Buying feminine products. Man, they go all out to hide the fact that you’re buying maxipads. They’d put the box of tampons or whatever in a brown paper bag, then tape it up nice and shut, then put that in a plastic bag, separate from the rest of your purchases. I mean, seriously people- it’s just tampons! There is no shame in buying maxipads!
I never had a reason to buy condoms in Japan (since I had brought my own), but I reckon they would have done the same thing.
Toni – I wonder if you can buy tampons and condoms from vending machines in Japan?
They do have beer vending machines in Japan. At least, they did when I lived there.
Marvo– Actually, I did find a vending machine in Japan that sells condoms. Dunno about tampons though. It wasn’t even in the big city; it was in the tiny little town where my boyfriend and I lived. We were walking around town one night and we saw this small, unadored vending machine in one corner. Yep, it was selling condoms!
Chuck– When I left in 2002, they still had beer vending machines. And I think they’ll be there for all eternity.
Chuck – The most exotic vending machines we had here were cigarette vending machines, but of course, they no longer exist.
Toni – I think the most popular vending machines in Japan are for beer and porn.