Saint Patrick’s Day is coming up and it’s a great day to get drunk, get pinched, and get caught urinating in public.
However, no one gives gifts for Saint Patrick’s Day. So this month two lucky readers will each receive a Saint Patrick’s Day gift from The Impulsive Buy.
These two lucky readers will each win A BOX of the Extra Cool Watermelon Gum, which I reviewed the other week. It’s enough gum to last for weeks, unless you have a strong oral fixation and you also like to share, then it will only last you a couple of days.
Just like last month, I’ll be having two separate drawings. However, this month, one drawing is for men only and the other drawing is only for the ladies in the hizzouse. So one Barney will win a box and one Betty will win a box.
However, if you happen to be a hermaphrodite, I will enter you in both drawings. But if you are a hermaphrodite, and you win, you MUST show proof in the form of a doctor’s note.
To enter this month’s prize drawing, just leave a comment for THIS post with THREE THINGS.
1. The words “Hey! Nice watermelons!”
2. Whether you’re a male, female, or a hermaphrodite.
3. Whatever else you would like to say.
Please fill out the email field, because I’ll be emailing the winners for their mailing addresses. Don’t worry about the shipping, I’ll take care of it.
The Impulsive Buy will start accepting entries for the drawing on Tuesday, March 14, 2006 and stop accepting entries on Sunday, March 19, 2006. Only one entry allowed per person. The drawing is ONLY open to those in the United States, US Military APOs, Canada, and Guam. (To the rest of the planet, I’m sorry.)
Good luck!
Fine Print: The Impulsive Buy promises your email address will not be used to send you spam about “lovely russian bittches in action.” (Yes, that’s how the spammers spelled it.) The Impulsive Buy also promises your mailing address will not be used to send you information about seminars that will improve your managerial skills. Bribes will not be accepted. The Impulsive Buy will not be responsible for lost mail, damaged mail, or Brokeback Mountain not winning Best Picture.
1. Hey! Nice watermelons!
2. I am a male.
3. I read this using bloglines.
Hey! Nice watermelons!
Male
Mmm… tastey watermrlons!!!
Hey! Nice watermelons!
Female, last time I checked.
Yummmm…!!!
HEY! NICE WATER MELONS!
MALE!
I ATE CEREAL THIS MORNING!
i can not wait for marvo to say “Hey! Nice watermelons!†to me i am a female and i am in love with marvo and my husband knows it kisses
Hey! Nice watermelons!
I am female.
Happy St. Patrick’s Day!
Hey! Nice Watermelons!
Of the Female pursuasion.
Whatever else you would like to say. (Sorry, couldn’t resist)……….
Hey! Nice watermelons!
I’m a male for 49 years now!
Hey! Nice watermelons!
Female for life!
Yesterday one of my high school students asked me if we were in B.C. or A.D. years. I fear for the future.
Hey! Nice watermelons!
Male -izzle
I am uber-irish.
Hey! Nice watermelons!
Female
Could never have spelled vinaigrette on my own, thanks Marvo
Mmmm gum!
The words “Hey! Nice watermelons!â€
Yes, I am female!
Gum is yum!
Hey! Nice watermelons!
I’m a male
Sadly, nothing to say.
Hey, nice watermelons!
I’m a male.
I am in a hurry so I don’t have time to think of anything funny to say.
Hey! Nice Watermelons!
Male
30, single, enjoys long walks on the beach and product review blogs….
“Hey! Nice watermelons!â€
I’m a female, so the watermelons comment felt a little awkward!
Hey! Nice watermelons!
male
Does the runner up get pictures of a nice pair of watermelons?
Hey!!!! Nice Watermelons!!
I’m a Female
Trust me…. I’m Irish!
Hey! Nice Watermelons!
Female
Hello Marvo, thanks for your blog.
Hey! Nice Watermelons!
Female
Bubble.
Hey! Nice watermelons!
I am a chica
Here’s how to say the first sentence in polish: „Hej! Åadne arbuzy!”
Hey! Nice Watermelons!
Female
“Even a stopped clock is right twice a day.”
– Proverb
Hey! I have nice watermelons because I’m female!
Thanks for the blog, Marvo 🙂
I am a male, and I say “Hey! Nice Watermelons!” I enjoy them, because I’m male.
1) Hey! Nice watermelons!
2) female *fluttering my eyelashes*
3) I never win your prize drawings, but still find you very sexy.
Hey, nice watermelons. I’m a female, and I always get a fluttery feeling when I see the Impulse buy has been updated, Hooray!
1. Hey! Nice watermelons!
2. female
3. ::is always horrid at this sort of thing::
“Hey! Nice watermelons!â€
Dood, I’m a chick, man!
I would like to say that I would so chew the hell out of a pack of Watermelon Extra gum, and that afterwards my jaws would ache and pop uncontrollably due to my TMJ.
Hey! I am a female with very nice watermelons!
I also happen to adore watermelony deliciousness and I check the Impulse Buy every single day because I am a huge slacker in class and you’re funny.
Niiiiiiiiice watermelons!
Glad the site’s back! I’m a big fan
Things you never want to hear from your proctologist:
“Hey! Nice watermelons”
I’m a man, baby!
Great Oden’s hammer!
“Hey! Nice watermelons!”
Thank God I’m female.
Yesterday I spent several minutes picking the watermelon flavored jellybeans out of a huge bag of Starburst Tropical jellybeans.
“Hey! Nice watermelons!”
Thank God I’m female.
Yesterday I spent several minutes picking the watermelon flavored jellybeans out of a huge bag of Starburst Tropical jellybeans.
Hey! Nice Watermelons!
I’m male.
There is some milk in the refrigerator that is about to go bad…
…..And there it goes.
Hey! Nice watermelons!
mmmm, I definitely want to try that gum!
I’m female!
I think….let me check….
YUP!
Hey! Nice watermelons!
I have nice melons, thus am a female.
And I’d like to say that I watch too much American Idol
Hey, Marvo? Did you see that adorable woman waving at you yesterday? You know the one…the one that made you say, Hey, that female has nice watermelons? Remember her? Yeah, that wasn’t me, never will be, but I’d be very happy if I won the prize this month!
Hey! Nice watermelons!
I have no melons 🙁 I am a male.
Hey! Nice watermelons!
Male-type
this is not haiku-friendly
Hey nice watermelons!
I’m a female 🙂
and you freaken rock my socks off!
Hey! Nice watermelons!
Male.
Who knew the USA team would struggle so much in the World Baseball Classic.
1. Hey! Nice watermelons!
2. Male, but I will do the surgery if I get reimbursed for all expenses. And I
win the contest.
3. I didn’t get first post. Shame. Go add gravators to The OTHER Blog.
Meh, just read your comment that you can’t do gravatars. kthxbai
“Hey! Nice watermelons!”
male.
Grrrrr.
Hey! Nice watermelons!
male
watermelon candy flavor tastes nothing like real watermelon, which is very tasty.
Hey! Nice Watermelons!
I’m a male!
DOWN WITH PANTS!!!
Hey! Nice watermelons!
I’m female!
Sometimes I get distracted by my toes.
Hey! Nice Watermelons!
I am male.
Your watermelons are chewy.
Hey! Nice watermelons!
I am a woman.
I love the smell of watermelon candy!
Hey! Nice watermelons!
I’m a guy
Sweet chewy goodness!
So I’m a male and said to this girl, “Hey! Nice watermelons!”
Then she slapped me and I ran away.
If I had a dollar for every time I heard “Hey! Nice Watermellons!”, I’d be a rich, rich girl. Instead, I just have nice watermellons.
Hey! Nice watermelons!
Male
Vault soda rocks!
Hey! Nice Watermelons!
Male
I swallowed a penny once.
“Hey! Nice watermelons!â€
I am a female 🙂
I love that photo of the bubble gum bubble blowing little girl!
Happy early St. Patrick’s Day, Marvo & The Impulsive Buy readers.
Hey! Nice Watermelons! Male here.
are you into that whole corned beef and cabbage thing?
Nice watermelons, Marvo! I am female. xD
Happy St. Patty’s Day!
Hey! Nice watermelons!
Very male. Like male-er than all youz.
Um, “whatever else”
Hey! Nice watermelons!
Female…most of the time.
I need me some melons.
1.“Hey! Nice watermelons!â€
2. Female
3. Arrrgh, I’m a pirate.
Hey! Nice watermelons!
Marvo,
I have very limited hopes to win but love your reviews so I keep trying.
I know I was just very happy when you reviewed the PB kisses and mentioned my name. I guess I am easy.
Karen
Hey! Nice watermelons!
Male
I love the watermelon gum! Even if it does make me feel a bit effeminate when I chew it…
Hey! (Check out my) nice watermelons!
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v724/gpparsons/bra2.jpg
If you hadn’t guessed…I’m female
What would Buck Angel qualify as?
1. The words “Hey! Nice watermelons!â€
2. Male
3. I’m glad I’m not competing in the same pool as #63.
1. Hey! Nice watermelons!
2. female
3. 36C 😉
Hey! Nice watermelons!
I am a girl!
I am a gumaholic
Hey! Nice watermelons!
I am a male!
I am a girl who often hears the phrase: “Hey, nice watermelons!”
Love, love gum!!!!!
hey, nice watermelons! despite my name, i’m female. if i were to win a certain box of artificially-flavored watermelon gum, it would be gone in a flash because i raffle off gum and office supplies to my students on a weekly basis. i rest easy at night knowing that any gum and/or candies i buy for my kids in bulk form do not risk becoming stale, hardened, and unloved.
Hey, thats some nice, round, plump and juicy watermelons you got there. The gum looks pretty tasty too.
I’m a girl!
I can no longer afford gum, or any other of the small comforts… We purchased a car and a new house. SOS
1. Hey! Nice watermelons!
2. I’m one of the ladies in the hizzouse.
3. Marvo has mad product reviewing skillz.
1. Hey! Nice watermelons!
2. Female
3. I donate blood at work only because they give me 4 hours off.
I once blew a bubble inside a bubble in grade school. I will attempt it again if I win this.
“Hey! Nice watermelons!†would apply to me if I were walking down the street. Actually, “Hey! Nice navel oranges” would be more apt. Does this answer the gender question? (Clarification hint: My navel oranges emerged via hormones I was born with, not the kind that come with the operation)
I was born a man, but since then have undergone expensive surgery so everyone that walks by me will shout “Hey! Nice watermelons!”.
😉
“Hey! Nice watermelons! “.
male
I’m a school teacher for the summers off
Hey! Nice watermelons!
Female, as per my watermelons
I just watched the movie The Cutting Edge…I lead a sad life
Hey, nice watermelons.
Female.
Pick me, pick me, pick me!!!
HEY!!! Nice watermelons.
I am a female…who quit smoking recently, thus chewing insane amounts of gum…and its my birthday! And also I love your site. It rocks my socks.
1. Hey! Nice watermelons!
2. Female
3. That gum looks fucking BOMB ASS
Last night, there was an 8-hr sale at Albertson’s (grocery store). There were some great deals — blocks of cheese for $0.99, Wolf Chili cans for $0.49, pork loin for $1.49/lb and seedless watermelons for $2.99. When I saw them, I couldn’t help but point them out to my husband and say, “Hey! Nice watermelons!” They were the perfect size, round, and a lovely shade of vibrant green. Sadly, he wouldn’t let me purchase any because we are never home (and the watermelon would likely rot before we’d eat ’em). I also hit the clearance aisle and managed to get both hair dye and gel F.A.C. (free after coupons). I didn’t need the stuff, but what can I say, I’m female, parsimonious, and I can’t pass up a good bargain, especially on girly items.
So, I was walking down the street and some guy is whispering to his friend. I can see them out of the corner of my eye, and I know they are talking about me. So I turn around and and call out to them, “Hey! I hear you over there! What did he just say to you?!” And, startled, one of the guys says, “He.. uh.. He just said that girl has nice watermelons!”
I said, “Oh. I know. I just got them from that fruit stand over there.”
xoxo
[See how I fit everything in? Wonderful.]
1. Hey! Nice Watermelons!
2. Female
3. OOH! SOMETHING SHINY!
Hey! Nice Watermelons!
Female
Watermelons are the Most!
Hey! Nice Watermelons!
Female
Watermelons are the Most!
Hey! Nice watermelons! I’m ALL woman!!! I need gum to keep me awake at my soul-sucking, mind-numbing job…
hey, nice watermelons!
i’m a girly-girl
i’d really rather somebody else win because i only chew orbitz gum.
also, you mentioned nobody giving gifts for st. patty’s day. actually, in my irish family, we do give each other little gifts to celebrate. and http://www.redenvelope.com (the best gift-giving site ever in my opinion) has a whole section of st. patrick’s day gifts. you should check it out!
i am not paid to say nice things about redenvelope.com, i just really love them. i wish one day soon they will start shipping to APOs!
1. Hey! Nice Watermelons!
2. Female – some might even say lady
3. May you arrive in Heaven and hour before the Devil knows you are dead! -Old Irish Toast
“Hey! Nice watermelons!â€
female
I really enjoy your website. 😉
“Hey! Fantabulous watermelons! Are they real or artificial? Can I feel ’em?”
I AM THE “finder of all misplaced things around the house that noone else can remember where they put ‘it’ because it is never put back in it’s rightful place where they got it from originally so now it’s frigging LOST *sigh*”, ….so I MUST be a female. I think the uterus was originally meant as a homing device……
Gimme sum gum, dammit.
“Hey! Crack-head!….I saw you steal that nice watermelon…SECURITY!!”
I like shoes…..I AM female!
Don’t give this awesome prize to any toothless tweaked-out meth head…they’d probably just sell it anyways!
Guys tell me “Hey! Nice watermelons!” because I’m female.
Hey! Nice watermelons! Female! Your site brings me great joy!
1) Hey! Nice watermelons
2) Female
3) Likes- People who find me attractive
Dislikes- People I attract
Since I’m a guy when I saw the hot hotel clerk all i could think was “Hey! Nice watermelons!
“Hey! Nice watermelons!â€
I’m a guy – and this is a cool, funny site… just stumbled across tonight.
Thanks!
Jeff
Hey! Nice watermelons!
I’m a male.
This is a great site. I hope I’m not too late to enter the contest!
Hey! Nice watermelons!
I hope I’m not saying that towards any of my fellow males, because they’d need some serious bro-idg.
Thanks to all who participated in this month’s drawing.
Winners will be announced later this week.