Tyson likes to tout themselves as a family brand that gives the family a good source of protein so that the family can come together as a family during family time. Basically, they like to cram the word “family†as much as they can into every commercial while throwing in the occasional “wholesome†and “nutritious.†How, then, can they justify selling this?
This, of course, is their new Any’tizers line of products which feature such strange treats as bacon/cheddar chicken bites and Burger King-style chicken fries. Tyson says that this line is necessary in the world of frozen food because “snacking has become the fourth meal in today’s busy households.†However, we all know that Taco Bell is in fact Fourthmeal (Yes, that’s how they spell it), so I’m not sure who they’re trying to fool.
I decided to try it out anyways and went for their cheddar jalapeno chicken bites. These are three ingredients that I love on their own, but I was certainly skeptical of their ability to be tasty in deep fried ball form. I don’t believe that I’ve ever had processed chicken mixed with cheese, but I figured that I love Oscar Meyer cheese dogs, so it couldn’t be all that bad.
I was mostly right. The image of melted cheddar oozing out of the chicken is undeniably strange, but the flavor is suitably mild. I actually enjoyed the jalapeno in the bite as it was spicy without being overbearing. I tested it on various dipping sauces, from ranch to ketchup, even digging through my fridge for some salsa con queso as seen on the box. I found that it tasted best on its own, as sauces masked its flavors.
These won’t replace regular chicken nuggets for me, but it’s a tasty treat for kids and those gross people who enjoy mixing their food together as they eat.
(Nutritional Facts – 4 pieces – 200 calories, 100 calories from fat, 11 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 35 mg of cholesterol, 450mg sodium, 13 grams of carbs, 3 grams of dietary fiber, 0 grams of sugar, 13 grams of protein, 0% Vitamin A, 0% Vitamin C, 8% Calcium, and 4% Iron)
Item: Tyson Any’tizers Cheddar & Jalapeno Chicken Bites
Price: $3.79
Purchased at: Albertsons
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Real jalapenos give it a spicy kick. Cheddar cheese flavor is mild. Pretty tasty without need for dipping sauce.
Cons: Processed chicken means that the bites won’t please more adult palates. Some would find the combination of flavors off-putting. Pricier than regular chicken nuggets. Tyson trying to steal Fourthmeal from Taco Bell.
I mix my rice and corn together. Does that make me gross?
“a good source of protein” HAH! I wonder how much chicken is inside the fried batter and alongside the processed cheese? NOT MUCH! But, I might have to try these, since I’m jalapeno-holic. Yeah, it’s diagnosed! 😉
Michael Pollan is puking his guts out at the thought of this.
Mix some of these babies with veggies and rice and you have a yummy meal. This shit is still way overpriced…unless you buy them from Sav-A-Lot.
Ace, did you take the cross-cut photo on top of a white basketball? I mean, it’s a delicate composition a la Iron Chef, but I’m worried about the nubbly surface.
@ Domokun: I think he took the picture on a pair of old white leather pants a’la 80’s from Marvos closet.
That has been the only picture on this site that made me a little ill.
Those actually look kind of good! You need to find the deep fried macaroni bites.. heaven.. i swear to god!
Awesome. These look cute. Are they really spicey?
So Ace, how did you prepare these? To make them extra unhealthy I would recommend a deep fat fryer. QVC used to sell one, don’t know if they still do.
Ew! I was immediately grossed out the second I read Any’tizer.
Those are disgusting. One day, my roomates and I were low on food. So one of them made spaghetti with the Anytizers in place of ground beef.That was the nastiest meal ever. And I had to nod my head along and say
“Mmm, yumm, good idea” : X
Ditto the repulsed by “any’tizer” comment. Reminds me of sanitizer, which of course is used to clean the bathroom. (that stuffed chicken nugget thing looks sickly.)
I would try these. I’ve got to say that picture looks great! Very artistic and foodie.
However I’m drinking ruby port bought on sale at my local supermarket, so I’m easily pleased.
Marvo – It could be a lot worse, I know people who mix the mashed potatoes with cranberry sauce. Yuck, I declare!
nat – You’re addicted to jalapenohol?
Captain Needa – I don’t think emulsified chicken is anything to be ashamed of. Perfectly normal, perfectly natural.
Alex Lifeson – No Sav-A-Lot’s around here, but sometimes 99 cent stores will have these things if they don’t sell well. Of course, that’s only if you don’t mind eating expired or nearly expired frozen food (which I sadly don’t).
Domokun – Those are my napkins which are supposed to absorb 50% more liquid with it’s basketball-like design.
luckinflux – Not even the mandarin orange salmon cups? I mean…they were mandarin orange salmon cups!
Lex – I’ve seen deep fried macaroni balls at Cheesecake Factory and Friday’s too but have never dared order them for fear that the people I love would have a food intervention.
Shannon – They have some kick to them, but nothing that would make you run for water.
Chuck – I LOVE when QVC sells those things and tell me that it’s healthy because frying “locks in the juices” and that very little oil is absorbed. Yeah right!
Kylie – I see you are adverse to horribly pun-tacular food names as well.
Megan – That sounds absolutely terrible, which flavor was it? I can’t imagine any of them being good with spaghetti.
SheRa – I hadn’t thought about that. Maybe it is a little ironic that thinking about sanitizers is the least appetizing thing you can do.
StephanieS – Thank you, watching Top Chef religiously has taught me how to stack things upon themselves.
Fried mac ‘n’ cheese bites really are amazing. I get them at my local Sonic, and they’re incredibly addicting.
Cheddar+Jalapeno = Yes
Cheddar+Jalapeno+chicken = NO NO NO
At the local shop they used to have Jalapeno’s filled with cheddar, those where aweseom, but they don’t sell ’em anymore *sadface*
These don’t look really appealing to me, better of with just ordinary nuggets, smothered and wich nacho cheese and sliced jalapeno’s
I saw that review and yeah it was nasty but I was expecting that. This shit looks like you took a tribble, deep fried it and then did a cross section for a biology class.
No. (Thats my comment….just no)
I eat these alot, I hate to admit it, but I do. and I love them. they are so delicious, but they wouldn’t be without hidden valley ranch.
also, the bacon cheese flavor is good. the other ones..not so much.