I thought the original Jones Soda WhoopAss Energy Drink was mediocre and the outside of the can was better than what was inside of it. Well, the original WhoopAss Energy Drink is getting its ass kicked to curb and being replaced with a completely refreshed version.
It will now come in an all-black 16-ounce can with an Iron Cross graphic, bitchslapping the anime-inspired artwork on the original can into history. What’s in the can will also get the Vulcan death grip. The updated version of WhoopAss will be a deep bruise purple color, instead of the bright yellow pee-like color of the original. Finally, the new WhoopAss Energy Drink will karate chop your taste buds with an exotic, subtle fruit flavor with notes of dragonfruit.
Along with an energy boost, the new WhoopAss will contain the antioxidant kick of 2.5 servings of vegetables and help with muscle recovery. The antioxidants will come from yerba mate, grape extracts and green tea. It’s also stuffed with taurine, L-Arginine, L-Carnitine, L-Lysine. The energy will be provided by a blend of B2, B3, B6 and B12 vitamins.
The new version of WhoopAss Energy Drink will retail for a wallet-punching $2.39 per can and will hit the stores sometime in November.
well. considering i already drink two quarts of yerba mate a day and i get b12 shots because i’m a strict vegetarian, i think drinking this would cause me to instantly combust or something. but, hey, why not.
Nah, it would probably make you talk really fast or make you eat a carrot really quickly. 🙂
Your color descriptions have me salivating!
The site of bruising make me salivate too. There’s nothing like sinking my fangs into tenderized meat. Oh crap, I’m pulling TIB into a vampire phase.
I’m still stuck on title… Who you callin’ a punk ass, biotch!! oh, and for a moment there, I though you said “pee-flavor”, not pee-color.
Pfff. I call anyone I like a punk ass, you punk ass. Although I will not call you a bitch because I would be ashamed of myself if I did.
It is still crap, in fact worse than it was before.
I go to school and spend most my time in Seattle (home of Jones Soda). They had someone in front of my school on Broadway handing them out. It tastes like someone made a watermelon jolly rancher soda and added all the bad parts of red bull.