I know. The year isn’t over yet, but the likelihood of this list changing sometime during the last days of 2011 is pretty much nil. So here’s a list of the top 10 most popular Impulsive Buy reviews posted in 2011. This list is based on traffic numbers from Google Analytics. So here they are in a particular order:
MiO is a great water enhancer, but it also makes a great white t-shirt enhancer.
9. Wendy’s Berry Almond Chicken Salad
According to the internets, Wendy’s is positioned to overtake Burger King and claim second-place in fast food chain marketshare sometime next year. That’s nice, but perhaps they could speed up the process by building a few more Wendy’s locations here on this rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. I’ve got three Burger King locations within a three mile radius, while Wendy’s closest location is six miles away.
Domino’s has been busy during the second half of 2011. First, they released these fancy Artisan Pizzas and then late last month they introduced their Stuffed Cheesy Breads. They’re trying really hard to make people forget how crappy their pizzas used to be. I still think bringing back the Noid will help.
7. Subway Oven Crisp Chicken Sub
This sandwich will probably show up again as a $5 Featured Footlong. My psychic powers tell me it will come back in May 2012. (Note to people from Subway Corporate who may or may not read this: Please bring the Subway Oven Crisp Chicken Sub in May 2012 so I don’t look like a total boob.)
6. McDonald’s McCafe Frozen Strawberry Lemonade
I remember the brain freeze this gave me. And for some reason, it also gave me the urge to buy a lava lamp.
I hope McDonald’s releases more McFlurrys using Hershey’s least popular candies with names that are fun to say. I’m looking forward to either the Whatchamacallit or Thingamajig McFlurry.
4. Burger King California Whopper
Every year, Burger King should release several Whopper varieties commemorating states, just like the US Mint did with quarters.
3. Ben & Jerry’s Red Velvet Cake and Clusterfluff
Clusterfluff is one of my favorite Ben & Jerry’s ice cream names ever. Sadly, according to my sources, they had to change it to What A Cluster. I really hope, in 2012, Ben & Jerry’s makes a flavor honoring Samuel L. Jackson called, I Have Had It With These Motherfudging Cakes On This Motherfudging Plane!
2. McDonald’s “New” Chicken McNuggets Sauces
Still order Hot Mustard with my McNuggets. I’ve also started ordering a McChicken without mayo and paying an extra 25 cents for Hot Mustard container to replace the mayo.
1. McDonald’s Mango Pineapple Real Fruit Smoothie
This is the second straight year a blended McDonald’s product has ended up at the top of our year in review list. Man, I remember when McDonald’s used to be known only for their burgers, French fries, and that purple blob Grimace. Times are changin’.