Right now in my freezer there are only two food items that have been in there for over six months — a half full bag of store brand chopped broccoli and Guy Fieri’s S’mores Indoor Pizza.
In another six months, I expect both to still be occupying freezer space because I’m scared to open them, especially the s’mores pizza, but for the six months they’ll be joined by a Kellogg’s Eggo Drizzlers strawberry topping packet because the topping made with real fruit is…
What do the kids say nowadays?
Um…
Oh yeah, weak sauce.
Each Eggo Drizzlers box comes with six waffles and three topping packets, each of which holds about an ounce of strawberry weak sauce. The Eggo waffles included are the exact same circular breakfast modules that you know and love (or have nothing else better to eat). They are prepared in the toaster the same way as any other Eggo waffles. The topping, according to the box, can be heated in two ways:
1. Place the topping packet in a cup of warm water while the waffles are being toasted.
2. Warm topping packet in hand while toasting waffles.
But if you really want to multitask, I’d recommend a third option. Clip the topping packet to an ID lanyard around your neck and take a shower with it while the waffles are in the toaster.
After the waffles are done and the topping is warmed up, tear open the strawberry sauce-filled packet like it’s a condom wrapper and squeeze out its contents. As you can see in the photo above, there’s enough in one packet to cover two waffles.
But, again, the strawberry topping is weak sauce.
If your child is used to syrup from Mrs. Butterworth’s, Aunt Jemima, or anything else that’s dark, viscous, sugary, and comes in a plastic bottle, then the strawberry topping might not satisfy their taste buds and sweet tooths. Although, the topping has a gooeyness similar to pancake syrup, its strawberry flavor was light and not that sweet.
However, the strawberry topping has around 50 percent less sugar than syrup from Mrs. Butterworth’s, Aunt Jemima, or anything else that’s dark, viscous, sugary, and comes in a plastic bottle. So if you’re looking to cut your child’s sugar intake (or want to make your paunch disappear), use the strawberry topping packet.
Since I don’t have a child with a sugar problem or a paunch big enough to encourage me to do something about it, and I don’t care for the Eggo Drizzlers strawberry topping (and I turned the last two waffles into a peanut butter and jelly sandwich), the last topping packet will keep my freezer burned broccoli and s’mores pizza company in the freezer…and, when I decide to clean out my freezer, in the trash can also.
(Nutrition Facts – 2 waffles & 1 topping packet – 250 calories, 70 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 15 milligrams of cholesterol, 370 milligrams of sodium, 55 milligrams of potassium, 41 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, 4 grams of protein, and a bunch of vitamins and minerals I’m too lazy to list.)
Item: Kellogg’s Eggo Drizzlers Strawberry Waffles
Purchased Price: $3.00 (on sale)
Size: 6 waffles & 2 topping packets
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 5 out of 10
Pros: Same ol’ Eggo waffles, if you like Eggo waffles. Leftover packet keeping company other frozen food. Topping has less sugar than regular syrup. Enough topping to cover two waffles. Topping is made with real fruit. Multitasking.
Cons: Strawberry topping was light on flavor and not that sweet. Only six waffles per box. If you’re addicted to pancake syrup, topping will not suffice. Freezer burned broccoli. Showering with a topping packet.