The Impulsive Buy

REVIEW: Toffee Crunch Oreo Cookies

Toffee Crunch Oreo Cookies Package

So, I feel like I have limited experience with toffee. I’ve had a couple of Heath Bars, and maybe even a Skor or two, but I’m generally not one to just sit around gobbling fistfuls of the brittle English… candy? Confection? Building material?

But it pairs well with chocolate, I think — as evidenced by the aforementioned bars. So it only makes sense that it’s now an Oreo filling. After all, everything is an Oreo filling, right? Swedish Fish? Oreo filling. Cherry cola? Oreo filling. Your mom’s meatloaf? Probably going to be an Oreo filling.

But like Jeff Goldblum said in Jurassic Park, “Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should.” Was he talking about Oreo flavors? It’s been a long time since I’ve seen the movie, so I don’t remember. Maybe? But I guess what I’m getting at is, just because the Oreo scientists can stuff their cookies with whatever fillings their demented minds can dream up, should they? Well, no, not always. (Looking at you, Kettle Corn, Pina Colada, Cotton Candy, and Root Beer Float, to name but a few.)

But in this case? It’s fine.

The toffee creme has a noticeable buttery flavor, but it’s very mild. To replicate toffee’s crunch, “sugar crystals” have been added to the proceeding. They crunch, and they’re fine, but they do nothing to enhance or detract from the overall affair. Because the toffee punch is so subtle, I was left wishing that there would have been more, you know, Double Strength or whatever they call it. I’m not sure they do that with these one-off flavors, though, so I was left with nothing more than a dream.

One mildly interesting side note: about 3/4ths of the pack had half of the cookie inside-out. So like, the decorative side was pressed into the creme and the smooth side was facing out. Do I think this affected my eating experience? Uncertain, but I’m leaning toward “no.” Was it mildly interesting? Sure. But not, you know, enough to make me want to buy them again. Because I feel like that would be a really peculiar reason to buy another package of Oreo cookies, right?

In the end, these were acceptably okay but absolutely nothing special. If you’re a completist, you’ll want to try them, and I feel like, as long as you’re tolerant of toffee, you’ll enjoy them just fine. If you’re just an “Oreo-a-few-times-per-year” person, you might want to stick to your known commodities lest you end up with a sad stomach.

Purchased Price: $3.67
Size: 17 oz package
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 cookies) 140 calories, 6 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 90 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 13 grams of sugar, 13 grams of added sugar, and less than 1 gram of protein.

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