Since I live on a tropical rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, I don’t get the opportunity to face the extreme nipple-hardening weather many of you are experiencing or will be experiencing.
I’ve discovered one of the few ways my nipples can experience what your nipples are (or will be) going through is to wet my pointer fingers with my tongue after sucking on a popsicle and then using those fingers to rub my nipples in a circular motion until they’re stiff enough to poke an eye or make it look like there are two volcanoes sticking out of the hairy forest on my chest.
Because it’s extremely rare for me to experience temperatures well below 68 degrees for days, weeks or months at a time, I can’t imagine what it’s like to be standing in the checkout line in a warm grocery or convenience store and be reminded of the harsh, fripple-inducing weather outside by the chewing gum and mint flavors on the shelves next to the checkout counter.
These flavors include: Wintermint, Cool Rush, WinterFresh, Polar Ice, Cool Mint, Winterfrost, Midnight Cool, Dragonfruit Freeze, Arctic Chill, Wintergreen, Lemon Ice, Crystal Frost and Shiver Mint. Brrrr. My nipples are a little stiff from just saying those names.
Another product that might depress someone before heading out into frigid weather is the new Ice Breakers Peppermint Frost Mints. Yup, it’s got the words “ice” and “frost” in its name, a word for each nipple.
While Altoids describes their mints as, “Curiously Strong,” Ice Breakers alliterates their Frost Mints as “Perfectly Powerful.” Each circular Frost Mint is roughly the size of my nipples and has the same “flavor crystals” found in Ice Breakers gum. However, those crystals are part of a chalky coating and once that coating melts away, all that’s left is a smooth meek mint.
Overall, they’re good peppermint-flavored mints and are “Perfectly Powerful” for those who can’t handle the minty burn of regular Altoids. I estimate the Frost Mints provide 75 percent of the minty power of Altoids, but that’s not enough for me. Because as someone who masochistically sticks several Altoids in my mouth at one time while simultaneously rubbing my nipples, that 75 percent doesn’t come close to satisfying my desire for painful minty pleasure.
(Nutrition Facts – 1 mint – less than 5 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 milligrams of sodium, 1 gram of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, 1 gram of sugar alcohols and 0 grams of protein.)
Item: Ice Breakers Peppermint Frost Mints
Price: $2.19
Size: 1.2 ounces/Approx. 30 mints
Purchased at: Foodland
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Good peppermint-flavored mint. Sugar-free. Perfectly powerful for those who can’t tolerate the curiously strong Altoids. Putting the word nipple in every paragraph of this review. Minty pleasure.
Cons: Once outer coating melts away, minty flavor weakens. Uses some artificial flavor. Won’t satisfy those who enjoy the slightly painful sensation of Altoids. Fripple-inducing weather. Container is not as cool as an Altoids tin. Being reminded of the cold weather by chewing gums and mints.
I can use these mints to get rid of the puke taste that was induced with all your nipple talk.
They are powerful, but I don’t know if they puke penetrating powerful.
Altoids gum is my favorite for breath freshening.
I feel the same way about most chewing gums that the guys in light beer commercials feel about the flavor of light beer. They pretty much taste all the same.
Nippletastic
Nipplelous!
…yours is better.
has anyone experienced the intense pain in your throat if you drink water after one the ice breakers frost mints ?? its happened to me twice and second time was excruciating- help me – anyone else?
Reb, YES. Excruciating pain. I’ve experienced it twice and it’s literally the most ridiculously painful thing. I had to get something to eat and drink to make it go away. So weird and awful.
It was awful. Whatever you do…DO NOT bite into these. There is a specific chemical near the center of these, and it’s all in one pocket. I bit into one of these, and found that pocket. Whatever chemical it is, it tastes horrible. All the sudden, I felt horrible pain in my mouth, and when I tried to flush it out with water, it became unbearable. I chugged warm tap water for about 2 minutes. And when I looked in the mirror, my eyes were puffy and bloodshot and my whole face was read. Will not be buying these again.
DO NOT BITE INTO ICEBREAKERS FROST MINTS! I did this morning and experienced an intense pain in my mouth unlike anything. Very strange whatever chemical that caused this horribly painful sensation, water made worse when I tried to flush out the agent. KEEP THESE AWAY FROM CHILDREN! The pain was so intense I had to stop what I was doing, not a fun time! my advice it to: NOT BUY ICEBREAKERS FROST BREATH MINTS!
I thought I was NUTS – this intense pain happened to me too. I felt intense jaw pain & was beginning to think perhaps I was allergic & my throat was closing up. It was quite scary. It continued to hurt while breathing in for a short time afterwards. I had to search this out to see if anyone else experienced something similar.
Yes!!! Me, too! I was driving, and almost had to pull over…could only bear to take shallow breaths…excruciating! Glad to know it wasn’t just me.
i just bought these and also made the mistake of biting into one of them as soon as i it put in my mouth, i could not believe the pain in the back of my throat, it was frozen, i tried flushing it with water, it was too painful, even breathing in was extremely painful, thank goodness the pain went away after a couple of scary minutes thinking these had done some serious damage, THESE THINGS SHOULD NOT BE SOLD, NO JOKE
I bit into one of these and what a big mistake it was, I thought my throat was bleeding, it was was extremely intense. I looked in the mirror my whole face was red.
” These things are scary” someone will get injured eating one of these things.
Same thing literally just happened to me. Do not bite these things. In fact, I’d say skip them all together. I couldn’t talk to anyone at work for five minutes. And definitely don’t drink any water with them. Intensely painful.
I’m not sure if it’s more of a batch issue or something; I chomp these all the time and usually don’t have any problems. But on a handful of occasions I’ve gotten the dreaded Supermint of Agony. No rhyme or reason to it; I’ll find that lone mint in the container mixed in with perfectly normal mints.
It is pretty ridiculous when you get one though. Painful is no exaggeration. I like the normal mints otherwise, but getting the Supermint is no laughing matter.
OMG… so glad to find this website! That happened to me yesterday as I was chewing three of the mints. I have MS and thought I was having a very serious exacerbation. It lasted for a full ten minutes. I was unable to speak. After it finally passed, I actually felt beat up from it. Needless to say, I will not be doing this again!
Yes,I bit into 2 of these at 1 time like a total moran and they were very, very painful to the back of my throat. Felt like I had an ice cube stuck in the back of my throat. I mean like severe spasming pain. This shouldn’t happen when you eat a mint, so whatever they put in them that cause this they need to take out. I thought I was having an allergic reaction!! Gald I found this site.
ME TOO. I thought i was experiencing anaphylaxis. was TERRIFIED. These should NEVER be sold in stores, i complained to Hershey this morning. was HORRIBLE.
I was offered one of these mints today and within seconds had the same reaction as those described above plus a severe headache. I agree with those who said that drinking water makes it worse. I had to sit down and took several minutes to recover. Two extra strength Advil helped. I plan to make a report to Hershey tomorrow.
Holy crud! It happened to me in a store today. I was scared to death! Breathing in made my throat and the roof of my mouth hurt so bad. I was sweating too. My husband said my face was really red. I put my hands next to my nose or on my jaws to try to relieve the worst ice cream headache I’ve ever had! Unbelievable. I’m telling Hershey’s too. I had about 7 mints from the box before this happened. Pain pain pain!
This just happened to me like 5 minutes ago! I think I hit the minty pocket and I fell to my knees!!! When I breathed in it was like I had an ice cube in my throat but worse! I tried to drink milk which made the pain twice as bad! Never buying these again!!!!!!!!!! EVER!!!!
This just happened to me! Glad I found this right away so it didn’t trigger a panic attack or something. Never having one of these again!
wtf do you keep talking about your nipples? getting them hard? the size of them? wtf no one cares or wants to know. sorry but disturbed me reading it
I thought I had throat cancer and even had x-rays and scope if nose and throat yesterday…the pain in my throat was so horrible…I have been eating these mints for the last month for sore throat…little did I know these mints were the reason for my needle sharp pains in the back of my throat…unable to speak after eating a mint and drinking water….these should definitely be taken of the market….no one should ever eat these…so glad I found this website…I thought I was crazy and very sick
If you are stuck in the cold I hope you have more than a mint to keep you warm, and I hope you have the decency
not to play with your-self or your nipples. It’s a rare thing to imagine flavors of mint while rubbing on your-self and trying to get your nipples hard.Do think of this, just take a trip to Starbuck’s and spend a few doller’s on some coffee.
You need to rethink about the mind state of this exercise and how cold is your nipples.