Author: Joe

What is the Coffee Oreo Blizzard?

The Coffee Oreo Blizzard fulfills my childhood dream of being an ice cream secret agent. This “secret” menu item tasks my alter ego secret agent DQ7 with requesting coffee syrup to be blended with the standard vanilla base and Oreo cookie pieces.

How is it?

The basic request for a coffee infusion added a flavor so light that I thought it was undercover itself. A slight mocha note peaks its shy head up in the bites that are light on Oreo magic. A spoonful consisting of cookies galore on the other hand drown out the faint whispers of coffee flavor found in their absence. This raises the vanilla floor, but the Oreo cookie ceiling isn’t even raised enough for Oddjob. The coffee syrup is a pleasant but uninspiring addition.

Is there anything else you need to know?

I take any opportunity to don a tuxedo and affect a terrible, and probably offensive, British accent. It is however completely unnecessary when ordering from the “secret” menu. At least based upon the lack of a convoluted plot to slowly lower me into a gigantic bladed Blizzard stirrer.

To order the Coffee Oreo Blizzard for yourself, simply ask for coffee syrup to be added to the Oreo Cookie Blizzard. If you want more than just a hint of coffee, ask them to double it. Just don’t ask for it to be shaken and not stirred unless you enjoy exasperated eye rolls. I was not charged extra for the coffee flavoring, but they may have been scared of my license to chill.

Conclusion:

My first mission as a Dairy Queen secret agent ended satisfactorily. Coffee flavor fans will find this hack to be neutral at worst, and at best, an incremental upgrade unworthy of Q. Next time, I will ask for a heavier hand with the java juice.

Purchased Price: $4.19
Size: Medium
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: None available.

What is it?

A new Blizzard gracing the menu for September, snickerdoodle cookie dough and cinnamon sugar mixed with vanilla soft serve.

How is it?

The Snickerdoodle Cookie Dough Blizzard reminds me of the fantasy football draft I participated in while eating it. The prospect of cinnamon sugar cookie dough leaves me salivating just as a new season’s roster full of fantasy goodness does. Unfortunately, both end the same way as well —- with me chagrined.

Dairy Queen clearly spent its first pick on cinnamon sugar rather than invest in a bell-cow cookie dough. The base presents a heavy cinnamon flavor that pervades throughout in spite of DQ fumbling at thoroughly mixing my Blizzard. Meanwhile, the promised sugar teammate provides the distinct crunch and fun grit that one expects to find in a snickerdoodle.

Despite the hot start, the cookie dough fails to impress. While it contains the standard soft and gritty DQ texture, whatever innate flavor the dough possesses is entirely overwhelmed by the cinnamon sugar ice cream. Furthermore, the pieces lack any hint of the tanginess found in a traditional snickerdoodle cookie. Rather than serving as a star player, this relegates the dough to a flex spot. This predictably caps the Blizzard’s upside. And I realized this as I was being kicked out of a league for trying to draft Cookie Monster at QB.

Is there anything else I need to know?

The Snickerdoodle Cookie Dough Blizzard is the only new offering on Dairy Queen’s Fall Blizzard Menu. Also available are the returning Oreo Hot Cocoa, Dipped Strawberry with Ghirardelli, and September’s Blizzard of the Month, Pumpkin Pie.

Conclusion:

Dairy Queen replicates the superficial elements of a snickerdoodle cookie, but it fails to capture enough of its spirit to truly impress. The end of the cup didn’t leave me dejectedly crying in the shower like this year’s draft, but it isn’t taking home the Shiva Bowl Trophy either.

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: Mini
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Mini) 400 calories, 16 grams of fat, 8 grams of saturated fat, .5 gram of trans fat, 30 milligrams of cholesterol, 180 milligrams of sodium, 56 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 42 grams of sugar, and 8 grams of protein.

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What is it?

One of two 4th of July themed treats, the limited release Star Spangled Blizzard mixes blue candy with cherry flavored soft serve topped with a signature DQ ball and curl; red, white, and blue DQ Stars; and a Stripes StarKiss frozen treat.

How is it?

The saying beauty is only skin deep applies to ice cream too apparently. The StarKiss bar is a clever marketing gimmick that adds nothing to the taste experience while making it more difficult to actually eat the Blizzard.

Its rapidly melting form forces you to consume it immediately. Ironically not the star of the show, I’ll briefly say that beyond the cherry stripe there is only a nondescript artificial and substandard sweetness.

After extracting the not so bomb pop, the cherry syrup flavored soft serve is buried beneath the vanilla curl where I wish I had left it. While visually striking, the cherry substrate’s flavor is, in a word, bad. In more words, it is as authentic to cherry as Robitussin watered down with corn syrup.

While the plain, but classic, vanilla helps, at no point did the cherry component enhance the Blizzard. Meanwhile, the blue candy provides a fun crunch but no discernable flavor of its own. Probably a good thing if the rest of the Blizzard is any indication.

Is there anything else I need to know?

I was asked what size I wanted despite the website and menu listing mini as the only option. It could have been asked out of habit, but I also paid $3.99 whereas the menu listed $4.29. Still a premium, but clearly there was a discrepancy.

Conclusion:

It’s a bad sign when I find myself wishing upon a StarKiss bar that this Blizzard was only plain vanilla and blue candy. As I learned with fireworks as a kid, some things are better seen than eaten.

Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: Mini
Rating: 3 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: Unavailable on DQ’s website as of July 4, 2018.