REVIEW: Good & Gather Collabs Ann Kim Pickle Pie Pizza

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The box for this Good & Gather Collabs Ann Kim Pickle Pie Pizza says it’s a “Product of Italy.” I’m a little skeptical about that because, as a country known for its fine cuisine, I’m not sure a pickle pizza is something folks in Italy would be proud of. Sure, consume enough bottles of Sangiovese, and that pride might go out the window. However, this product has another P surprise — potato chips.

I’m not going to lie. The idea of a pickle and potato chip pizza sounds great. I did enjoy pickle-flavored ice cream, so I guess the chances of me enjoying this is not far-fetched. However, the pickles here are pretty poor. They don’t taste like the dill ones in a cheeseburger. Instead, they remind me of the pickled plum in the middle of my bento’s rice. Okay, 75 percent of you may not have experienced Japanese ume, but it’s the only way I can describe its sour flavor.

While the pickles mostly get lost in the ranch sauce, cheese, and potato chips, it’s still noticeable enough to bring down the bites with it. However, their flavor, thankfully, doesn’t get absorbed into the rest of the pizza, so simply removing them made things taste better. Without them, the combination of crust, potato chips, mozzarella cheese, and ranch sauce brings back tasty memories of dipping potato chips into French onion dip. I enjoyed the pizza at this point, and this really should’ve been the Good & Gather Collabs Ann Kim Potato Chip Pie Pizza.

While its flavor sans pickles was surprising, I was equally surprised about how pleasantly crispy the wood-fired crust’s exterior was at the ends.

However, what was 1,000,000 times more surprising than that was how crispy the potato chips were after being frozen and then heated on top of a layer of cheese and a sauce. They were like I pulled them straight out of the bag. How in food science did this happen? Is it because the instructions say to let the frozen pizza sit at room temperature for 15 minutes? Did the cheese’s oil deep fry the chips and revitalize their crispiness? Is this a “Product of Italy” because it’s the only country allowed to do this magic?

If you’re a dill pickle lover, this Good & Gather Collabs Ann Kim Pickle Pie won’t give you what your taste buds want. But if you’re willing to discard the pickles, you’ll still get a unique-tasting pizza thanks to the other P ingredient.

Purchased Price: $9.99
Size: 17.1 oz
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1/4 pizza) 290 calories, 13 grams of fat, 6 grams of saturated fat, 15 milligrams of cholesterol, 690 milligrams of sodium, 30 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 1 gram of sugar, and 11 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Eggo Buttery Maple Ice Cream

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I’m happy to Leggo My Eggo Buttery Maple Ice Cream.

Not because it tastes terrible but because I like to share, and if I hold the container for too long, my fingers are bound to get frostbitten. Also, now that I think about it, if someone steals your fresh-out-of-the-toaster Eggo, just give it a few seconds, and I’m sure the thief will Leggo Your Eggo because their fingers are burning. Just stall them by reading this review out loud.

The bright yellow and red container contains brown butter-flavored ice cream, maple swirls, and maple-flavored fudge-coated waffle cone pieces. Note that there aren’t actual Eggo waffle pieces here, which makes sense since even well-done waffles become limp with a light dose of syrup and some time.

However, despite not having actual Eggo waffles, the ice cream as a whole does remind me of waffles and syrup. Please note that I’m not saying it tastes like maple syrup, which I’ve always thought is not as sweet as regular cheap pancake syrup. Also, it’s artificially flavored maple, which has always tasted like regular syrup to me.

The brown butter-flavored base has a mild taste, and I wish it stood out more. Tasting it on its own, which naturally happened several times since the swirls and waffle cone pieces weren’t everywhere, I felt its sweet butteriness could’ve been butter, I mean, better. It’s mild enough that it doesn’t come through when eaten with the sweeter swirls and cone pieces.

Speaking of this ice cream’s other components, the maple swirls provided most of the pancake syrup flavor. However, I would’ve liked more of the gooey ingredient throughout my container. But there were a good number of maple-flavored fudge-coated waffle cone pieces. While the fudge’s taste was somewhat similar to the swirls, the cone pieces inside were either as crunchy as cereal or disappointingly soft as a microwaved Eggo waffle.

While I did enjoy the flavor of this Eggo Buttery Maple Ice Cream, which did remind me of waffles and syrup, its mild-tasting base and the inconsistent crunch from the waffle cone pieces prevented it from being better.

Purchased Price: $6.99
Size: 14 fl oz container
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2/3 cup) 220 calories, 11 grams of fat, 7 grams of saturated fat, 40 milligrams of cholesterol, 75 milligrams of sodium, 30 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 25 grams of sugar (including 21 grams of added sugar), and 3 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Funyuns Sour Cream & Funyuns

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Initially released in 1969, Funyuns remained entirely unchanged from its cornmeal and onion powder origins for over thirty years until several short limited runs like Wasabi and Chili & Limon surfaced during the 2000s. Now, the circular snack can be found with the original ’69 flavor profile, as well as Flamin’ Hot, Spicy Queso, and my favorite: Steakhouse Onion. Yet, over 50 years since the chips’ inception, we get possibly the most on-the-nose and least outside-the-box limited release in recent memory — Sour Cream & Funyuns.

While it may not be the most creative of concepts, I enjoy the simplicity of this idea. Oftentimes, new flavor twists, especially from other Frito Lay brands like Doritos, are meant to wallop you over the head with flavor, and this one aims to combine the onion with the onion in perfect seasoning-meets-form-factor harmony — and it works!

Sour cream and onion is one of the most popular potato chip seasoning choices, so it’s no surprise that it works really well on an onion-shaped circle of corn meal. Looking at the rings, you can tell immediately that these aren’t your grandma’s summer of love Funyuns. These have little green specs and an even more prominent funky flavor aroma than the original, and the simple mashup delivers delicious results.

The airy crunch is the same as always, starting with a sweet onion that then evolves into a bit of garlic and finishes with a legitimate sour cream tang. That tangy flavor absolutely stacks when eating more rings, and the sour bite lingers for a couple of minutes afterward. This is essentially 75% of the Funyuns you already love (or hate) with a touch more bite and a creamy finish, which, for me, is a subtle but effective improvement on the original.

While I may never love Funyuns in the way that I do Fritos, Doritos, Cheetos, or any other fried corn delight, Sour Cream & Funyuns constructs the ideal seasoning setup for this spherical snack to contend with the big boys of the Frito Lay brand.

Purchased Price: $2.69
Size: 2 oz bag
Purchased at: 7-Eleven
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (13 pieces, 28g) 130 calories, 6 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 150 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 0 grams of total sugars, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Simply Pop by Coca-Cola

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I’m not sure why I have a thing for prebiotic sodas like Olipop and Poppi. Maybe I feel guilty and would like to do something nice for my digestive system instead of letting just McDonald’s Meal Deals and Mountain Dew flow through it.

But I’m not the only one with “a thing” for the better-for-you beverages. The segment is growing fast enough that Big Soda wants to be a part of it. However, Pepsi and Coca-Cola have taken two different routes. Pepsi recently purchased Poppi, and Coca-Cola decided to develop its own prebiotic soda offering — Simply Pop.

Simply Pop differs from others by adding more fruit juice. While the bigs in the prebiotic soda game have juice levels between 4%-19%, all Simply Pop flavors go beyond that: Citrus Punch (30%), Fruit Punch (25%), Lime (28%), Pineapple Mango (26%), and Strawberry (29%).

However, despite the use of fruit juices and natural flavors, the best way I can describe them is to say they taste somewhere between the top prebiotic soda brands and flavored sparkling water, but closer to the latter. I’ve tried many Poppi and Olipop varieties, and if you enjoy the sweet fruitiness of those, the taste level of Coca-Cola’s offering will burst your carbonated bubbles. Simply put, despite what the cans say, these flavors simply don’t pop. Also, some of them aren’t very good.

Citrus Punch tastes like an underripe Cuties mandarin orange; Strawberry reminds me of biting into a soft, overripe strawberry; Fruit Punch is like drinking watered-down Kool-Aid; Pineapple Mango has a flavor like the liquid from canned diced pineapples in water; and Lime, the worst of the bunch, tastes like I’m biting into lime rinds. I didn’t enjoy any of them, and I’m unwilling to repurchase them for my tongue or gut. I’ll be sticking with Olipop and Poppi.

However, with that said, something I noticed about these is that it’s hard to tell they’re prebiotic sodas. Again, I don’t like how they taste. But with Poppi, the apple cider vinegar in them is noticeable, and with Olipop there’s something about them that makes them taste, well, healthy-ish. With Simply Pop, I don’t notice anything that could be considered healthy-ish; they just lack a strong flavor.

So what makes Simply Pop a better-for-you soda? They have no added sugars. Instead, whatever is in the juices and monk fruit extract sweetens them. However, their most significant health benefit is fiber content, which they get from soluble corn fiber. I thought the part of the vegetable that the fiber comes from was corn husks, but after going down a corn hole about rabbit fiber. I mean, a rabbit hole about corn fiber, I learned that it actually comes from the kernels. However, while every can provides an impressive 21% of your daily fiber, Olipop flavors have an even better 32%.

Overall, Simple Pop is simply not as tasty as what Olipop and Poppi offer.

Purchased Price: $2.50 each (on sale)
Size: 12-ounce cans
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 can) Citrus Punch 60 calories, 0 grams of fat, 25 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 6 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar (including 0 grams of added sugar), and 0 grams of protein. Fruit Punch 50 calories, 0 grams of fat, 25 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 6 grams of fiber, 9 grams of sugar (including 0 grams of added sugar), and 0 grams of protein. Lime 60 calories, 0 grams of fat, 25 milligrams of sodium, 18 grams of carbohydrates, 6 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar (including 0 grams of added sugar), and 0 grams of protein. Pineapple Mango 60 calories, 0 grams of fat, 25 milligrams of sodium, 18 grams of carbohydrates, 6 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar (including 0 grams of added sugar), and 0 grams of protein. Strawberry 60 calories, 0 grams of fat, 25 milligrams of sodium, 18 grams of carbohydrates, 6 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar (including 0 grams of added sugar), and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Dairy Queen Crunchin’ Cookie Dipped Cone

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Last year, some lucky Dairy Queen test markets were treated to a “Cookie Monster” dipped cone, a very blue offering with crushed-up bits of chocolate cookies in the cone dip itself. According to Dairy Queen, this results in the ultimate cookies and cream taste and texture. This Spring, the colorful cone has gone nationwide, and the chain dropped the monster moniker, introducing it instead as the Crunchin’ Cookie Dipped Cone. Apparently, this dip is brought to us only by the letters D and Q and not affiliated with any muppet-populated street. It hasn’t needed any famous tie-ins to gain popularity though; it’s already made a splash, and viral hacks using the dip have made their way onto the menu. On a recent springlike day, I tried this cookie concoction to see if it was all it was crunched up to be.

As a former Dairy Queen employee, I was trained to take my cone-struction pretty seriously, and I’m always a little disappointed to get one that doesn’t look exactly like it should. In defense of whoever made mine, they didn’t do too bad. It was missing the classic curl and could maybe have used a few more seconds in the cone dip, but this doesn’t affect the flavor or the fact that this is an eye-catching ice cream. I had hardly ventured out the door when I crossed paths with an elementary school-aged kid who let out an audible “Woah!” at the sight of this thing.

It’s hard to be in anything but a good mood when you’re holding an ice cream cone, and it’s even harder when that cone is enveloped in a blue shell studded with cookie pieces. This cone is just pure fun. The chocolate cookie chunks are small, really small, so they’re not adding a whole lot to the texture but as with any dipped cone, you get a satisfying crunch from biting into it. Some parts of the shell come off in small pieces, and others separate themselves in much larger chunks, which is a nice contrast to the smooth ice cream interior.

Flavorwise, things are creamy and overall sweet like you’d expect. The cookie specks are mostly too small to bring real chocolate flavor to the party, but they still give off a cookies and cream vibe, more akin to a Hershey’s Cookies ‘N’ Creme bar than an Oreo cookie. If you’re looking to up your intake of both dip and cookies, you can try one of the hacks. The first blends Crunchin’ Cookie Dip into an Oreo Blizzard and serves it alongside a small additional cup of liquid Cookie Dip, and the second layers Crunchin’ Cookie Dip with Oreo pieces and soft serve, parfait style. Not all locations offer these options, but even if you can’t get your mitts on them, this cone in its original form is a tasty and joyful treat that won’t leave you, or your tongue, feeling blue.

Purchased Price: $5.09
Size: Small Cone
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 320 calories, 15 grams of total fat, 25 mg of cholesterol, 105 milligrams of sodium, 40 grams of total carbs, 31 grams of total sugars, and 6 grams of protein.