Category: Reviews

REVIEW: Milk Chocolate Pumpkin Pie M&M’s

Mark 1 Comment

We live in an era when food companies try to inject pumpkin spice into everything and when Mars introduces multiple unique flavors throughout the seasons. What a time to be alive! (I say that in earnest.)

So, of course, Mars has experimented with pumpkin spice versions of America’s favorite candy-coated chocolate. (Well, at least the country’s favorite candy-coated chocolate that is not shaped like eggs.) M&M’s introduced a Milk Chocolate Pumpkin Spice flavor in 2013, with spice flavors mixed with chocolate. In 2015, it switched to Milk Chocolate Pumpkin Spice Latte, which I never tried. And in 2017, it ditched the milk chocolate and introduced White Pumpkin Pie M&M’s, which stuck around for a few years. That version was my favorite, and I thought it came close to pumpkin pie. The 2024 offering combines the milk chocolate of a decade ago with the “pie” name of 2017.

(True story: I bought the pumpkin spice flavor in 2013 and 2014. Then, in 2019, I found an old package of it in my house that had somehow managed to escape the trash can, and there was one solitary M&M left inside. You better believe I ate it because what kind of a candy reviewer would I be if I didn’t? It wasn’t great after five years, but I didn’t die.)

This new variety is the standard size of M&M’s novelty flavors, and there is no special filling besides the chocolate. It just tastes like chocolate and spices to me. My palate isn’t discerning enough to tell you what spices, but it definitely tastes like fall. I’m reminded of the pumpkin spice hot cocoa I take on September camping trips, and I think of October trail runs among the yellow and red leaves.

Beyond the spices, though, I’m afraid these really have nothing in common with pumpkin pie, texturally or flavor-wise. Nothing reminds me of crust. Nothing reminds me of the squishy, custardy part of pumpkin pie. Nothing reminds me of the namesake squash.

It wouldn’t surprise me if Mars reused the pumpkin spice recipe from 2013 and 2014. But I can’t know for sure because it’s been ten (…or five) years since I had that one.

M&M’s stopped making the White Pumpkin Pie version, and I can’t help but feel like this milk chocolate version is a step backward. It’s hard to complain about chocolate, but Mars promised me pumpkin pie, and it failed to deliver.

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: 2.47 oz. bag
Purchased at: 7-Eleven
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1/2 pack, 35 grams) 170 calories, 7 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 25 milligrams of sodium, 25 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 22 grams of sugar including 20 grams of added sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Maruchan Hot & Spicy Chicken Ramen Funyuns

Vin 4 Comments

In my recent review of Korean-Style Sweet & Spicy Chili Ruffles, I whined and pined for more snacks with flavors inspired by the Far East. Well, not two weeks later, the good folks over at Frito Lay obliged.

Now, I’m not saying they saw the review, called the folks over at Maruchan, brainstormed, decided to collab on new Hot & Spicy Chicken Ramen Funyuns, and then went into a fast-tracked production process that put bags on shelves in world record timing, but… that’s exactly what I’m saying. That’s clearly what happened. The Impulsive Buy has that much pull in the snack industry.

The pairing was surprising, especially coming from a snack line that rarely remixes the original recipe, but I’m glad these two brands linked up because this is really good. It also made me ponder why we haven’t been sprinkling ramen flavor packets on things other than ramen all this time?

I have a little bit of a love-only relationship with Funyuns, but I’m happy to say these scratched the flavor itch I was yearning for, as well as the roof of my mouth (more on that later).

When I opened the bag of what looked like seasoned curly fries, I got a big whiff of poultry seasoning, but it somehow also smelled “hot,” so they were off to an accurate start.

That accuracy rolled on because, yeah, these taste like crispy Funyuns coated in a packet of spicy chicken ramen seasoning. Mission accomplished.

There’s a dryness to them that I always get from chicken-flavored snacks. For some reason, I associate that with chicken flavor. These could have easily just been “Spicy Chicken” flavored, but there is a little of that fabled “Asian flare” that I can’t articulate to make it resemble the flavors of a bowl of ramen – a cheap bowl of ramen, but I still like the cheap stuff.

Since reviewing Spicy Queso Funyuns, I was a little worried that these would also completely swallow up the traditional onion flavor of the Funyuns. But it actually managed to come through a bit on the finish. Maybe it was just a little onion powder in the spice concoction, but I tasted it nevertheless.

As for the heat level, I’d put these at about two-thirds of the way to “Flamin’ Hot,” which is more than tolerable. You won’t have any problem eating a small bag in one sitting… but you’re gonna tear your mouth up. I somehow avoided that on the Spicy Queso, but the dreaded “savory Cap’n’ Crunch” Funyuns got me this time. That, coupled with the salt and spice, dried my mouth out for hours, but whatever, it was kinda worth it.

Honestly, this is probably the best Funyuns offshoot I’ve had, and while I think this flavor would have been even better on a chip, I’d love to see a few more ramen-inspired releases.

That’s back-to-back really tasty Asian-inspired products from Frito Lay. I hope they keep ’em comin’.

Purchased Price: $2.69
Size: 2 1/8 oz bag
Purchased at: 7-Eleven
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (About 13 pieces) 130 calories, 6 grams of fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 140 milligrams of sodium, 18 grams of total carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of total sugars, 1 gram of fiber, 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Kit Kat Ghost Toast

Julie 8 Comments

Only a junk food enthusiast will experience an emotional rollercoaster ride upon the release of a new Kit Kat flavor. This time, Kit Kat Ghost Toast, the brand’s newest seasonal Halloween flavor described as “crisp wafers in cinnamon toast flavored creme,” elicited the following reactions, in this order:

  • Delight. Ghost Toast! How cute! It rhymes!
  • Concern. Can ghosts even eat toast? Won’t the crumbs just fall through their hollow bellies directly onto the ground? Is this why they moan and rattle chains? Are they hungry for toasty warm bread they’ll never experience? Since I misplaced my Ouija board, I’ll never know.
  • Relief. On the bright side, Kit Kat has chosen an appealing flavor with whimsical wordplay that is neither overdone (like boo-berry) nor unhinged (imagine a boo-loney or ghoul-ash Kit Kat!).

Sufficiently in spooky mode, I bought a bag of snack size bars from Giant Eagle’s Halloween candy display. From the winking ghost on each wrapper to the candy’s orange-colored creme, these bars are well-dressed for the season. They will make a fun addition to any treat bag or scary movie night.

The Kit Kats may emit a scent reminiscent of a Christmas candle, but their flavor makes up for it. Ghost Toast tastes so much like a dream collaboration between Kit Kat and Cinnamon Toast Crunch that my initial concern swelled to a panic. Is the ghost on the Kit Kat wrapper the spirit of CTC’s former baker mascot, Wendell?

While it may be too late for me, don’t let this conspiracy theory divert you from the Kit Kat’s delicious cinnamon flavor. The cinnamon is strongly concentrated within the crisp wafers, a smart choice to achieve a perfect pairing of taste and texture. One crunchy bite will remind you of cinnamon-sugar toast or cereal.

The creme has some cinnamon flavor, but the familiar sweet, white chocolate-esque taste of Kit Kat’s white creme shines more. Further supporting the Cinnamon Toast Crunch vibe, the cinnamon-tinged creme reminds me of the Cinnadust-infused frosting released by Betty Crocker. Some might find the creme too sweet to be true to the flavor of cinnamon toast, but Kit Kat Departed Soul Iced Cinnamon Roll just doesn’t have the same zing.

Kit Kat Ghost Toast is cinnamon toast meets creamy candy sweetness. The cinnamon in the wafers elevates the cinnamon flavor significantly. It is such a major improvement on the brand’s past cinnamon endeavors (namely the okay-but-forgettable Churro Kit Kat) that you will be shocked not to see Cinnamon Toast Crunch branding on the wrapper. Try it before the season is over—or be haunted by the missed opportunity.

Purchased Price: $4.99
Size: 9.8 oz bag
Purchased at: Giant Eagle
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (per 2 bars) 150 calories, 8 grams of fat, 5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 20 milligrams of sodium, 18 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 14 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Hostess Mystery Flavor Twinkies

Brandon 13 Comments

Unless he commits a series of particularly heinous murders or, god forbid, becomes an elected official, it stands to reason that we will not know the name Dude Dad in five years. (To be frank, I didn’t know it before buying this box of Twinkies.) Like 98% of all modern day internet characters, he is transient by nature, and will be gone as quickly as he appeared, a mildly concerning but short-lived rash in YouTube form.

It is fitting, then, that he is the spokesdude for Twinkies’ new mystery flavor; mystery flavors, be they for soda or snack cake, are not made with permanence in mind. Instead, they exist as a quick way for their brand to make a buck when all of their standard offerings are lagging.

So what IS Twinkies’ new mystery flavor? Opening my first package, I got a slight odor of “mildly burning plastic.” That dissipated quickly, however, and I was left with the scent of straight-up Twinkie. The spongy outer cake is traditional Twinkie, so no clue there. The cream, however, was distinctly different from a traditional Twinkie filling and, quite honestly, all over the map. My first thought was, “Oh, this is just cream cheese flavored?” And then, “No, wait— this is definitely berry.” By my third dip, I was convinced it was something tropical—pineapple, perhaps—but I was getting cotton candy notes by the fourth taste.

In the end, I had no idea. I tried the filling from two more Twinkies and had similarly diverging tastes each time. I even managed to add Key Lime and “something citrusy” to my list of guesses, and if I had to absolutely wager on something, I’d go with “Key Lime pie.” I’ll keep trying to guess because, hey, these are pretty decent, so I don’t mind having to eat them. (It’s worth noting that if this is a Key Lime Twinkie, it wouldn’t be the first time. There was a Ghostbuster-related “Key Lime Slime” flavor in 2016, of which we said, “The lime flavor is very subtle. It tasted like a regular Twinkie with a faint citrus flavor.” Which, yeah, precisely—these too.)

Visiting Hostess’s Instagram didn’t help; comments on their post about the mystery flavor yielded a wide and hilariously diverse range of guesses, including Cherry Limeade, blue raspberry, Pina colada, bubble gum, Twizzler, raspberry lemonade, birthday cake, peanut butter fluff, and Swedish Fish, to name just a few.

Visiting Dude Dad’s Instagram helped even less. However, I did get to see him attempt a humorous video exploring the differences between state’s firework laws, one where his wife did a better job mowing than him, and one where he and his wife went rollerblading wearing loud 90’s attire while singing along to “This Is How We Do It.” I think I’ll add “How did this guy get 1 million followers” to my list of mysteries. Thanks for the double mystery, Hostess!

Purchased Price: $3.48
Size: 13.58 oz box/10 pack
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 cakes) 280 calories, 9 grams of fat, 4 grams of saturated fat, 35 milligrams of cholesterol, 370 milligrams of sodium, 47 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 32 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Takis Cobra and Kaboom Tortilla Chips

Marvo 2 Comments

I can’t help but think about G.I. Joe and yell “COBRA!” whenever I look at the Takis Cobra design. The serpent’s red color really drives that thought into my head. But unlike Cobra’s attempts at world domination, these Takis Cobra Tortilla Chips don’t fail.

The reddish rolled tortilla chips are Worcestershire sauce flavored and have a medium level of heat, according to Takis’ heat thermometer. The sauce is not listed as an ingredient, but whatever natural and artificial flavors are used, they hit all the right notes in the dark sauce. There’s a pepperiness and vinegary tanginess with a hint of garlic and citrus. All of that creates a seasoning that’s gosh darn tasty and recognizable as the famous sauce I can never spell correctly off the top of my head.

The heat doesn’t come until a few moments later, and I agree with the thermometer that it’s a medium heat in the Takis universe. Cobra is definitely spicy but pales in comparison with Fuego or Blue Heat, which I need to take a break from with a cool liquid when eating them. As someone who likes to make a quick dipping sauce with Worcestershire and ketchup when my local McDonald’s forgets to include the Hot Mustard sauce I ordered with my McNuggets, I very much enjoy the flavor of these Takis. In fact, these make me disappointed that there has never been a Worcestershire potato chip in the US.

While Takis Cobra is as new as new can be, Kaboom has been out for a bit. It made its debut in Canada and it’s interesting to note that the Canadian version is ketchup and sriracha flavored, while this US version is described as “sweet and spicy sriracha flavored.” However, these rolled tortilla chips taste more like spicy ketchup than sriracha to me because of the wonderful vinegary tang, tomatoey punch, and noticeable sweetness these have. But that doesn’t bother me one bit because I am all for having more ketchup-seasoned chips in the US. Why does Canada get to have all vinegary and tomatoey fun?

Kaboom’s heat is also in the medium range, but I found them to be slightly spicier than Cobra. But it’s not hot enough to take away from its great flavor.

If I had to pick between the two, I would prefer Kaboom over Cobra because its ketchup taste tickles my taste buds more. Sadly, the former is a limited edition offering, while the latter seems to be a permanent addition. But I hope Takis brings back Kaboom every year for the summer season.

DISCLOSURE: I received a free product samples from Takis. Doing so did not influence my review.

Purchased Price: Received free samples
Size: 9.9 oz bags
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Cobra), 9 out of 10 (Kaboom)
Nutrition Facts: (1 oz/about 12 pieces) Cobra – 150 calories, 8 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 190 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 1 gram of sugar, and 2 grams of protein. Kaboom – 150 calories, 8 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 200 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 1 gram of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.