Category: Reviews

REVIEW: Burger King Crispy Taco

Louis 51 Comments

Burger King Crispy Taco

As a longtime Latino — 40 years and counting — for so long I have dreamed of an edible epoch in this nation’s history when there would be some form of taco available on every street corner, from every fast food chain, and on every dollar menu. Now, thanks to Burger King, this simple dream is now one step closer to fruition.

Besides the usual taco chains around town like Taco Bell or Del Taco, if I’m under oath, I’d have to admit that I supremely love Jack in the Box’s taco deal, consisting of two greasy corn shells filled with meat and cheese, both for a little over a dollar; it’s a good taste at a great price, especially when their ain’t a convenient taqueria in sight.

Burger King Crispy Taco 2

That being said, I do believe that Jack has finally met his snack match in Burger King’s tremendo Crunchy Tacos; with each equally greasy corn shell – that’s from the deep-frying, ya’ll – dripping with puro faux-Mexican flavor, the additives of a small dash of lettuce and a sprinkle of cheese, as well as a nicely proportioned glob of seasoned beef that, remarkably, doesn’t taste like ground up leftover hamburger filling, makes for a moderately spicy treat at a mostly fulfilling price.

As I sat there in the lonely Burger King, munching on the crunchy taco with affordable ease, I immediately noticed how it’s not at all rubbery, the way Jack’s tacos can often quickly get, especially fresh out the deep-fryer. Instead, the King’s maintains a stolid bite-path that never gets in the way of the beautifully greasy taste, which is far better than it sounds. These are very much like the tacos that one friend’s mom would make when you spent the night as a kid -— contrived as Hell, but delicious as Heaven.

Burger King Crispy Taco 3

Now if I had one complaint, it would be for the absolute lack of both taco sauce and taco salsa — the taco sauce that was supposed to come with the taco and a couple of packets of taco salsa to be included with my order. That’s like fries with no ketchup, if you ask me. So I guess if you happen to pick a pair — or even more, natch — of these tacos up, ask for extra sauce or, as I’m gonna start doing, just bring your own. I recommend San Luis; it’s in a white bottle that looks like bathroom cleaner.

Otherwise, McDonald’s, it’s your deep-fried taco move now. Cómpralo ya!

Purchased Price: $1.00
Size: N/A
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 170 calories, 9 grams of fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 10 milligrams of cholesterol, 360 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 1 gram of sugar, and 5 grams of protein.

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REVIEW: Starbucks Tie-Dye Frappuccino

Meghan 5 Comments

Starbucks Tie Dye Frappuccino

I have great news – I’ve recently opened an Instagram account! I may be a bit behind the curve, but late is better than never, and it seems I’ve joined up just in time to fully appreciate Starbucks’ newest Instagrammable blended beverage — the Tie-Dye Frappuccino.

Starbucks Tie Dye Frappuccino Shirt

Working at a store where rainbow-wearing hippies are the norm, I’m no stranger to tie-dye. In fact, I own quite a few tie-dye shirts of my own and even decided to wear one to Starbucks in hopes of matching my drink. Those hopes began to fall as I saw several people with staggeringly yellow Frapps walk by as I waited my turn in line.

Observing the lone, harried barista create my drink, I realized the tie-dye effect isn’t created by blending together multiple colors of syrup. Instead, multicolored sanding sugar was shaken onto the bottom and sides of my cup before a deluge of neon-yellow Frappuccino base was dumped on top. The colors start to bleed after everything settles for a minute, and, TAH-DAH! You’ve got a tie-dye drink.

Well, you’re supposed to have one, anyway.

Starbucks Tie Dye Frappuccino Blue Streaks

My drink, like those of the people in line before me, was colored Big Bird yellow and had only a light bluish tint going along one side of the cup. Completely missing were the vibrant reds, oranges, and greens promised by Starbucks’ in-store promotional material.

Starbucks Tie Dye Frappuccino Foam

The extra dusting of sanding sugar shaken on top of the whip was the most tie-dye thing about my drink, and even that looks like it could have been stolen off the Unicorn Frappuccino, which, by the way, was so influential in fast food history that it has its own Wikipedia page.

Although it’s hard to set looks aside concerning a treat with such visually focused marketing, the Tie-Dye Frappuccino actually tastes pretty good. It’s sweet – which is no surprise since a Tall has over 39 grams of sugar – but not cloyingly so, and it’s got a pleasant hint of banana that keeps it from tasting as blah as it looks.

I wouldn’t order this over my usual Cold Brew with Cold Foam but found it to be a pleasant departure from what I typically order, and thought it was especially refreshing on a hot and muggy July afternoon.

Even though Starbucks’ Tie-Dye Frappuccino may not be groovy enough to inspire everyone to forget their differences and love each other à la Woodstock-style, it’s still an enjoyable summer treat, and worth giving a shot while it’s still around.

Purchased Price: $4.95
Size: Tall (12 oz.)
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Tall beverage with whip) 280 calories, 100 calories from fat, 11 grams of total fat, 7 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 35 milligrams of cholesterol, 170 milligrams of sodium, 41 grams of total carbohydrates, 0 grams of dietary fiber, 39 grams of total sugars, 4 grams of protein, and 0 milligrams of caffeine.

REVIEW: Kellogg’s Limited Edition Froot Loops Birthday Cake Cereal

Meghan 2 Comments

Kellogg s Limited Edition Froot Loops Birthday Cake Cereal

What is Kellogg’s Froot Loops Birthday Cake Cereal?

Proudly serving as a fruity-smelling part of balanced breakfasts since 1963, Froot Loops has recently expanded beyond its usual selection of nonspecifically fruity breakfast cereals by releasing its new Strawberry Birthday Cake flavor, which, per the back of the box, promises to give the best that Kellogg’s has to offer in every bite.

How is it?

Kellogg s Limited Edition Froot Loops Birthday Cake Cereal 2

This certainly isn’t the best looking cereal Kellogg’s has to offer. Surprisingly pallid in comparison to the original, this cereal appears better suited for a funeral than any other celebration. Like many birthday cake-inspired cereals, each piece sports cute little sprinkles, but not nearly enough to stand out unless you examine them under a magnifying glass.

Kellogg s Limited Edition Froot Loops Birthday Cake Cereal 3

Similar to their depressing appearance, these Loops flop on the flavor front. In contrast to the nondescript yellow cake flavor often implemented by other cereals, this early morning sugar bomb attempted to remain true to its fruit-forward roots by utilizing strawberry cake as its inspiration. Since strawberry is a more definable flavor than “fruity” is, it’s too bad a negligible amount of strawberry flavor comes though here. It’s detectable, but not very strong, and certainly not distinct enough for someone to immediately think of strawberries while eating this.

Is there anything else you should know?

I take issue with these being specified to taste like Strawberry Birthday Cake. I may not be able to speak for everyone, but who considers strawberry as the flavor of choice for such celebratory cakes? Yellow cake is served at birthday parties. Save the strawberry cakes for summer barbeques.

Conclusion:

Kellogg s Limited Edition Froot Loops Birthday Cake Cereal 4

As an uglier, less flavorful take on a timeless classic, there’s no reason for Birthday Cake Froot Loops to exist. It’s only too bad this dud of a cereal didn’t sport a dodo as its mascot, because it’ll probably go the same way as them in a few months.

Purchased Price: $2.50
Purchased at: Food Lion
Size: 10.1 oz.
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts:: (1 1/3 cup) 150 calories, 1.5 grams of total fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0.5 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 0 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 200 milligrams of sodium, 34 grams of total carbohydrates, 2 grams of dietary fiber, 13 grams of total sugars, 12 grams of added sugars, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Sonic Reaper Spicy Margarita

Louis 11 Comments

Sonic Reaper Spicy Margarita

What is the Sonic Reaper Spicy Margarita?

As a part of Sonic’s somewhat innovative line of supposed non-alkie “mocktails,” the Reaper Spicy Margarita takes everything alcohol-lovers enjoy with a classic margarita, subbing the usual tequila with, what the Hell, the absolute terror of liquefied Carolina Reaper Peppers.

How is it?

As cold and satisfying as the Reaper Margarita is on the first sip, almost immediately, the fires of a demonic inferno are quickly unleashed on the insides of your mouth, burning your tongue, numbing your nose, and scalding your throat, causing anyone with a well-worn grip on their remaining senses to throw this drink down on the ground, cursing the heavens with a closed fist in a most stupid fit of self-imposed rage.

Sonic Reaper Spicy Margarita Top

While there is an extremely slight citrus-flavor that is hovering around, it is practically impossible to taste over the mouth-destroying Reaper additives, a garden-peppery coating the slowly moves down the throat in a esophageal thrashing that’s normally reserved for Saturday night at the taqueria, not for a Tuesday afternoon getting a Sonic Happy Hour treat on the way home from work.

Sorry guys, but this just doesn’t work; I mean, for real: who is this drink for?

Is there anything else you need to know?

The night I forcibly drank about half of this, the scalding belches and burps continually seared my gutwerks with each gastric devil-bubble that traveled up my throat. Consequentially, I ended up downing about two or three rather large gulps of Pepto-Bismol just to cool my aching body-tubes.

Conclusion:

Sonic Reaper Spicy Margarita Lid

Anyone who knows me knows how much I truly enjoy the spicier things in this life. Give a roundhouse kick of heat on just about everything I eat, please. That being said, I truly get what Sonic is trying to do here, but, if I’m being honest, this isn’t a drink as much as it is a novelty dare. The mix should be sold on page 35 of the Archie McPhee catalog, not at my local Sonic Drive-In. Maybe, just maybe, it would work if the Scovilles was brought way down, maybe to level it a bit more evenly with the sugar. But, as for now, it’s too little, way too hot.

Purchased Price: $1.79 (each)
Size: Small
Rating: 1 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 190 calories, 0 grams of fat, 230 milligrams of sodium, 51 grams of carbohydrates, 50 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Kellogg’s Krave Cereal Cinnamon Crunch and Strawberry Crunch

Adam 10 Comments

Kellogg s Cinnamon Crunch Krave Cereal

I give Kellogg’s a lot of credit with Krave. In an era when new cereal concepts barely last a year, the British import has stuck around with surprising popularity, much like The Office except without the musical exploits of Creed Bratton.

I credit this to a few things, one of which is the decision to add “more chocolate” to Krave. I’m old enough to remember when you’d bite into a cereal biscuit only to get—more biscuit. Today’s original and Double Chocolate Krave avoid the dreaded hollow biscuit, a trend that continues in the two newest additions to the Krave family -— Cinnamon Crunch and Strawberry Crunch.

Why the “Crunch” in their titles? I couldn’t tell you. The Krave Biscuits share the sub-optimal snacking qualities of their forbearers, each with a delicate, crumbly texture that sogs and saturates in milk.

Kellogg s Cinnamon Crunch Krave Cereal 3

When I was younger and less at risk for a whole host of health problems associated with excessive empty carbohydrate intake, I thought it was taboo to combine assertive flavors like cinnamon and chocolate in cereal. Turns out, the two are hardly fish and cheese, and Cinnamon Crunch Krave turns out the very best in the seemingly symbiotic relationship of cocoa and cassia.

Kellogg s Cinnamon Crunch Krave Cereal 4

A strong churros flavor coats each square, with a lickable, stick-to-your-beard sugary coating blooming into an admirable chocolate taste. In milk, this only gets better. What ensues is a flavor similar to Chocolate Toast Crunch but the chocolate is more concentrated. It is, unexpectedly, one of the better chocolate cereals I’ve had in recent memory.

Kellogg s Strawberry Crunch Krave Cereal

Strawberry Crunch Krave didn’t score as high. The strawberry powder tastes… interesting, which is about as cliché and proverbial as it gets but is nevertheless the most apt description. Overall, it has a kind of toasted sugar taste that doesn’t quite match the succulent and slightly tart sweetness of actual strawberries. It’s also noticeably artificial, much like the sticky granules that covered the short-lived Strawberry Tiny Toast cereal of a few years ago.

Kellogg s Strawberry Crunch Krave Cereal 4

Those hoping for some Neapolitan synergy sans vanilla will be disappointed; even in chilled Vitamin D fortified whole milk, the richness that makes strawberry and chocolate an actual thing is MIA. The chocolate competes with the strawberry powder, combining for two disjointed tastes that never come together in the classic Valentine’s Day combination. The cereal isn’t bad, but it’s a relative letdown.

As seems to be the case with many cereals released in pairs, Kellogg’s has at least one winner among its new Krave varieties. And, while Strawberry Crunch will probably win a few niche fans who were deprived actual fresh fruit as children, my gut feeling is that Cinnamon Crunch will take its rightful place on the shelves next to the other varieties. And, like an offbeat British sitcom, it might just stick around for more than a few years.

Purchased Price: $3.64 (each)
Size: 17.3 oz. box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 8 out of 10 (Cinnamon Crunch)
Rating: 5 out of 10 (Strawberry Crunch)
Nutrition Facts: (1 cup w/o milk) 180 calories, 6 grams of fat, 1 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 30 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, 14 grams of sugar, and 3 grams of protein.