Above is what the Jack in the Box Stacked Grilled Cheese Burger looks like…if you’re winding down your long night of imbibing fermented beverages. Below is what the Stacked Grilled Cheese Burger looks like without beer goggles.

The Stacked Grilled Cheese Burger sounds impressive, but it’s just a grilled cheese sandwich on top of a cheeseburger. It would’ve been spectacular if another grilled cheese was used as the bottom bun but, being my own buzzkill here, that would’ve helped boost this particular Munchie Meal’s nutrition facts past the 1,679 calorie, 97 grams of fat, and 3,538 milligrams of sodium it already has.

The meal not only contains the Stacked Grilled Cheese Burger and a soft drink, it also comes with two tacos and halfsie fries (half regular and half curly) in a special Munchie Meal box, which may come in handy if your Munchie Meal decides it doesn’t want to be digested.

Even though the Stacked Grilled Cheese Burger Munchie Meal’s price is reasonable for the amount of food it offers, deciding whether or not you should purchase it is probably something you shouldn’t do drunk, like driving, taking home a stranger from a bar, dialing exes, boiling water, and sneaking into a zoo.

I’m not going to write much about the other stuff that comes with the meal because the cheeseburger/grilled cheese sandwich hybrid is more interesting than all the other parts combined. But I will say, Jack in the Box tacos have really grown on me (it’s probably the grease), I wonder if I can ask for halfsie fries any time of day (just Googled it and yes I can), and I miss stealing Jack in the Box antenna balls.

Now back to the Stacked Grilled Cheese Burger. If you’re sober, you may think it’s just going to be a cheesier cheeseburger. But if drunk, you may blurt out something like, “It’s like there’s a cheese fondue fountain in my mouth. Let’s find out if my mouth turns into a cheese fountain when I open it. Get your bread ready. Bleeeh.” Both assessments are correct.

The burger felt like a giant savory Fruit Gusher in my mouth. After biting into it, I could feel cheese oozing, but it wasn’t the American cheese which goes from melty to congealed quickly, it was the creamy white sauce. The two toppings give the burger a cheesiness that drowns out most of the other ingredients. If it weren’t for the pickles, this burger wouldn’t have any flavor beyond a whole lot of cheese, buttery buns, and a little bit of meat. Thank goodness, Jack in the Box wasn’t as stupid as me and thought it would be awesome to include a second grilled cheese sandwich.

Overall, it’s a decent burger, but it’s also one I won’t be buying again sober. Its over the top cheesiness makes my mouth feel like I’m sucking down melted Velveeta with a cheese bong. However, if inebriated, who knows what I’ll do.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 meal w/o beverage – 1679 calories, 871 calories from fat, 97 grams of fat, 28 grams of saturated fat, 3 grams of trans fat, 129 milligrams of cholesterol, 3538 milligrams of sodium, 1496 milligrams of potassium, 144 grams of carbohydrates, 12 grams of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and 56 grams of protein.)

Item: Jack in the Box Stacked Grilled Cheese Burger Munchie Meal
Purchased Price: $7.00*
Size: N/A
Purchased at: Jack in the Box
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Decent burger. Great burger if you’re an inventor named Wallace who has a dog named Gromit. Pickles help it from being just cheese, meat, cheese, bread, cheese. Good price for the amount of food it offers. Halfsie fries can be ordered any time of the day. Jack in the Box tacos. Stealing Jack in the Box antenna balls.
Cons: Burger makes my mouth feel like I’m suck down melted Velveeta with a cheese bong. Drunk dialing exes. Excessive amounts of calories, fat, and sodium for a meal eaten late at night. Drunk driving. Available during the hours of 9 p.m. and 5 a.m. only. Sneaking into a zoo drunk.

*Because I live on a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, things are a bit pricier here. You’ll probably pay less than I did.