REVIEW: Aunt Jemima Cinnamon French Toast Instant Oatmeal

Stephanie 13 Comments

Aunt Jemima Cinnamon French Toast Instant Oatmeal

Regarding syrup-topped breakfast items, if pancakes are the Britney Spears (sort of plain without all the fixins) and Belgian waffles are the Christina Aguilera (foreign-sounding and crispy), then French toast has got to be the Jessica Simpson of the three. In my book, French toast will be forever doomed to third place. However, if I see French toast on a menu coupled with the words “cinnamon” or “vanilla,” I will order it without hesitation. It’s like those two words make it magically different – it’s no longer stale bread in egg batter. It’s sweet, golden heaven on a plate.

This must be what the good folks at Aunt Jemima had in mind when they conjured up their newest entry into the world of store-bought breakfast, Cinnamon French Toast Instant Oatmeal. Along with their other new flavor, “Maple Syrup” (…thinking OUTSIDE the box, Aunt J!), they have attempted to provide us with a modest simulacrum of the griddle breakfasts they are known for, in porridge form. Previously, you had to choose between a vaguely religious figure on the Quaker Oats box and a vestigial icon of racialized domesticity on the Cream of Wheat box. Now with Aunt Jemima in the mix (which has been owned by the Quaker Oats Company since the 1920s), we’ve got a new smiling logo in town.

I immediately went for the Cinnamon French Toast flavored oatmeal because, yes, it added the word “cinnamon.” The Maple Syrup flavored one was a no-go. Why anyone would choose to eat a meal that is named after a topping rather than an actual food is beyond me. The bright red packaging is inviting, reminding me of the boxes of frozen pancakes, frozen waffles, and frozen blueberry pancake-wrapped sausage I’ve scarfed down in the past. The oatmeal comes in boxes of four and ten. The 4-pack is cheaper ($1.00!) but still yields portions that are a bit on the small side. However, you should be doing what every cereal commercial commands and eating this as PART OF A COMPLETE BREAKFAST. So shut up.

Aunt Jemima Cinnamon French Toast Instant Oatmeal In A Bowl

Overall, Aunt Jemima Cinnamon French Toast Instant Oatmeal tastes pretty good. There is a rich brown sugar and cinnamon flavor which gives it just the right amount of sweetness. It’s not diabetic coma territory, but we’re not in Bland Town, either. Preparation is extremely easy, but adding boiling water and stirring don’t allow the rolled oats to really grow. Instead, they stay mostly flat as they soak, so it lacks that really filling quality you’d find in other brands. The oats do get tender, though, and the cinnamon flavor is rather robust. It doesn’t exactly recreate the flavor of authentic French toast, but it’s close… and for what amounts to about 25 cents per bowl, it’s an easy pick on a cold winter’s morn.

So, for those of us who prefer our hot breakfast in a bowl, Aunt Jemima has provided us with a pretty decent initial foray into the highly competitive world of instant hot cereal. As she goes up against Big Daddy Quaker Oats and Cream of Wheat in our local grocery aisle, here’s hoping Aunt J. takes home more than the bronze medal. Everyone knows that Third Place = mom jeans, and nobody likes that.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 packet – 140 calories, 2 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0.5 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 0.5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0mg cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 100 milligrams of potassium, 29 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of dietary fiber, 1 gram of soluble fiber, 11 grams of sugar, 4 grams of protein, 4% iron, 10% phosphorous and 8% magnesium)

Item: Aunt Jemima’s Cinnamon French Toast Instant Oatmeal
Price: $1.00
Size: 4 count box with 1.34 oz packets
Purchased at: Price Chopper
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Delicious cinnamon. Tasty brown sugar. Marginally convincing French toast flavor. 25¢ per bowl. Easy prep. Part of a complete breakfast.
Cons: The Jessica Simpson of breakfast foods. Small portions. Rolled oats stay flat in water. Mom jeans.

ANNOUNCEMENT: New Impulsive Buy Reviewer Stephanie

Stephanie 6 Comments

Hi everybody! I’m Stephanie, one of the newest writers for the Impulsive Buy.

When I was a kid, I wanted to write comic books, despite having a teacher tell me I would make more money writing novels. (Ha! You’d think he’d know more about penury, being, you know… a teacher and all.) So naturally, 80 bajillion years later, I wound up writing for an awesome product review blog! Yay, me!

I live in Los Angeles and work in the entertainment industry. Having come from Kansas (after a four-year collegiate stint in Michigan… Go Blue), it was here in LA where I learned the strange local custom of simultaneously loving food and hating one’s body. We partake then we self-punish. Dining out often fosters whining. Office birthdays inevitably bring mental suffering. (On that note, why buy a dozen cupcakes if nine out of ten people aren’t going to eat them, and the one outsider is just going to slice the tiniest sliver from one cupcake and leave the rest? They should just buy one cupcake and make it be for everybody. Then the sugar addicts can get their effing cake shavings, no one will abuse themselves for hours on end with kettlebells, and we can all shut up about it. I’m shutting up about it right now.)

Anyway, I eat food, and I love it. I’m a rebel, I guess. I can’t stand sliced avocado on sandwiches, but I keep an open mind about mostly everything else. That is what brings me here to The Impulsive Buy. I like to try new things, and I blow a gasket become terribly disappointed when a product doesn’t live up to the hype.

I’m here to give you the straight story. So, think of me as your epicurean private eye… a gumshoe endlessly thumbing through a stack of blurry, black & white telephoto snapshots of new and exciting products that may look like sugar and spice but is really poison through and through. It’s sad that you can hardly trust a soul out here in this filthy city, but it’s a sad world, doll… and I’m just here to save you the tears.

NEWS: Chocolate Covered Jelly Belly Jelly Beans Make It More Difficult To Figure Out Which Flavor You’re Eating

Marvo 2 Comments

Sometimes I like to go to a candy store that allows me to make my own Jelly Belly Jelly Bean bag and make one that has every flavor they have available. Then when I go home, slip into something more comfortable, light some scented candles, play some Marvin Gaye, blindfold myself with a silk scarf so I don’t know what jelly bean I pick, then pull a jelly bean out of the bag, then stick it in my mouth, chew it, swallow it, allow it to digest for a few hours, poop it out and then watch it disappear from my toilet.

Jelly Belly’s new Jelly Bean Chocolate Dips allow me to get rid of the silk scarf because each jelly bean is hidden in a coating of dark chocolate. It could be raspberry, very cherry, orange, strawberry or coconut. But I hope it’s not coconut because I don’t like coconut.

Jelly Belly’s Jelly Bean Chocolate Dips will be available December 6th via the Jelly Belly website in a variety of sizes.

REVIEW: Wendy’s Natural Cut Fries with Sea Salt

Marvo 30 Comments

Natural Cut Fries with Sea Salt

A sleeve of Wendy’s new Natural Cut Fries with Sea Salt is a lot like a European nude beach, because both contain lots of long, golden brown things with their skins left on.

I’m not sure why Wendy’s decided to change their original fries to these uncircumcised ones because I’ve always liked the original version which was my second favorite behind McDonald’s fries, albeit a distant second. Can’t Wendy’s settle for second place in my heart?

Changing fries seems like the trend with major fast food places not named McDonald’s. Both Burger King and Jack in the Box have changed their fries within the past 15 years. Heck, Jack in the Box changed their fries twice within the past six years. But, both fast food companies had reason to change their fries, because they sucked. Unfortunately, I think their updated versions still aren’t very tasty and are just there to make sure your value meal provides 75 percent of your daily intake of saturated fat and sodium.

What’s so great about Wendy’s Natural Cut Fries with Sea Salt? I’ll be lazy and let what I copy and pasted from a press release explain.

“The new fries incorporate a range of new ingredients and preparation methods to meet consumers’ demand for a better-tasting, higher-quality French fry. They are made 100% from Russet potatoes and sliced “natural-style” with the skin on for additional texture and taste, then cooked in proprietary oil that contains no allergens and has 0 grams trans fat per serving. They are finished with a dusting of natural sea salt to further enhance the flavor.”

Natural Cut Fries with Sea Salt Close

Wendy’s Natural Cut Fries with Sea Salt have a stronger potato flavor than their previous incarnation, thanks to the left-on skin. Hmm…I just realized they could be keeping the skin on their fries to keep them in line with Wendy’s slogan: “You know when it’s real.”

I’m slow.

The fries have a nice crispy exterior and an equally nice fluffy interior. I was happy to see that there weren’t any limp fries, which was the main problem with Jack in the Box’s Natural Cut Fries. I was also happy that the new Wendy’s fries weren’t very greasy. However, despite the use of sea salt, the fries weren’t as salty as I would’ve liked them to be. It’s disappointing because one of the reasons why McDonald’s fries are so great is their saltiness.

Wendy’s Natural Cut Fries with Sea Salt are still second place in my heart, but the gap between them and McDonald’s fries has widened a little. Although, to be honest, I don’t think Wendy’s fries will ever reach first place in my heart, not because of their flavor, but because they’re blocked by the saturated fat from all the McDonald’s fries I’ve eaten.

(Nutrition Facts – Medium/142 grams – 420 calories, 180 calories from fat, 20 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 500 milligrams of sodium, 54 grams of carbohydrates, 6 grams of fiber, 0 grams of sugar, 5 grams of protein, 10% vitamin C and 8% iron.)

Other Wendy’s Natural Cut Fries with Sea Salt reviews:
Grub Grade
We Rate Stuff
Epic Portions

Item: Wendy’s Natural Cut Fries with Sea Salt
Price: $1.99
Size: Medium
Purchased at: Wendy’s
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Stronger potato flavor than original version. Still second place in my heart. Use of sea salt. 0 grams trans fat. Potato skin adds flavor. Nice crispy exterior. Nice soft interior. European nude beaches.
Cons: Not better than McDonald’s fries. Copy and pasting from a press release. The saturated fat from McDonald’s fries preventing Wendy’s fries from becoming my favorite. Me naked at a European nude beach.