NEWS: Arizona All City NRG Brings Back Disturbing Memories of Airbrushed Overalls

Marvo 7 Comments

No matter how cool the limited edition subway series cans that contain the Arizona All City NRG look, I can’t help but feel some trepidation about them. Not only do they bring back the upsetting memories I have of airbrushed clothing, they also make me feel like I’m in the wrong part of town and I better get the hell out. I’ve watched enough Law & Order to know where the wrong part of town is.

The energy drink has a pomegranate flavor and is non-carbonated. According to Arizona Beverage Company, “Going ‘All City’ means going all out” and the All City NRG has enough caffeine, taurine and guarana to give you the energy to run away from the popo after they catch you tagging a wall or their police car. An 8-ounce serving contains 150 milligrams of caffeine, 100 milligrams of guarana and 1000 milligrams of taurine.

The Arizona All City NRG comes in 16-ounce cans and an 8-ounce serving contains 100 calories, 0 grams of saturated fat, 10 milligrams of sodium, 28 grams of carbohydrates, 27 grams of sugar, 50% vitamin C, 100% vitamin B6, 100% vitamin B12 and 100% pantothenic acid.

NEWS: Reynolds Wrap Foil From 100% Recycled Aluminum Makes Hats Used To Avert Mind Reading Aliens Eco-Friendly

Marvo 9 Comments

I’m feeling much better about my attempts to thwart aliens from reading my mind, prevent cell phone waves from reaching my brain and to prohibit Martha Stewart from brainwashing me through the picture radio, thanks to the new Reynolds Wrap Foil from 100% Recycled Aluminum. Now I can use an entire roll of it to make a foil hat and not feel bad when I have to make a new one the next day since the power of the foil hat lasts only 24 hours.

It’s made from post-consumer and post-industrial aluminum, which may include: scraps from industrial cable, automobile components, cookware, gutters, siding, and stadium seats. So perhaps, if you’re lucky, sometime next year you might have a small part of Yankee Stadium or, if you’re unlucky, you might get a little bit of Shea Stadium this year. The Reynolds Wrap Foil from 100% Recycled Aluminum is as clean and safe to use with food as regular Reynolds Wrap Foil made from virgin aluminum.

Even the packaging is made from recycled and eco-friendly materials. It’s available in 50-square-foot rolls in standard strength and 35-square-foot rolls in heavy duty strength, which is the strength of choice for those looking to prevent aliens from reading your mind.

NEWS: McDonald’s Looks To Dump Their Angus Burger Upon Us Nationwide

Marvo 16 Comments

After being tested in California, New York and Ohio markets for more than two years, it looks like the McDonald’s Angus Burger will be expelled nationwide from the sphincter of McDonald’s test kitchens. According to a report in the Chicago Tribune, the one-third pound burgers made from 100% Angus beef could be excreted this fall or possibly during the summer.

The three Angus burgers currently being served at test markets are:

Deluxe – a burger with cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, red onions and pickles

Mushroom & Swiss – a burger with sauteed mushrooms and tangy swiss cheese

Bacon & Cheese – a burger with cheese, bacon, red onions and pickles.

Each Angus burger will cost around $4, making it one of their most expensive sandwiches. It’s unknown whether the burgers will be a permanent menu addition or a product available for a limited time, like the constantly-resuscitated McRib.

Damn, I wish the McRib would just die already.

Read our review here

[via GrubGrade and Chicago Tribune]

REVIEW: Pepsi Throwback and Mountain Dew Throwback

Marvo 39 Comments

All right Pepsi, this time I’m ready for your new…I mean, retro Pepsi Throwback and Mountain Dew Throwback sodas. I’ve got money to buy them and space to hold them, so I’m already several steps ahead of you. I’m going to hoard those Throwback bitches like I’m stocking up my fallout shelter for the next decade after someone releases a deadly virus that turns people into mindless zombies or whatever else video game designers think the post-apocalyptic future will consist of.

I already have a lot of regret from not stocking up on Crystal Pepsi, Pepsi Summer Mix, Pepsi Blue, Pepsi Twist and Pepsi Holiday Spice, although my stomach lining probably doesn’t feel the same way. At the time, I thought they were going to be around forever, so it didn’t dawn on me that I should buy out every store within a 50 mile radius. If only I knew then what I know now, I would be sipping on a vintage bottle of Crystal Pepsi as I type this, making retro hipsters everywhere jealous, and I would be making tens of dollars selling an occasional bottle or can on eBay to some kid who saw a segment about it on VH1’s I Love The 90s.

Pepsi Throwback and Mountain Dew Throwback takes drinkers to a time when sodas weren’t sweetened with high fructose corn syrup (HFCS), instead they were sweetened with real, natural sugar. It was also a period when disco wasn’t annoying, Larry King had only three marriage under his belt and all it took for a woman to get a guy horny was to show one of her bra straps.

I thought using real sugar was going have the same effect a bikini has on Jessica Alba’s body — making them much sweeter. But the real sugar seems to mute the flavor of both sodas. Or maybe I’m mistaking that for the lack of bite these don’t have, but the HFCS versions do have, which for a few the bite feels somewhat like you’re a ShamWow spokesperson getting your tongue bitten by a prostitute.

Both sodas also seem to be less carbonated, which makes them easy to drink and smooth as it slides down my gullet. But perhaps it’s too smooth because I could see how some people might think they’re drinking a flat soda. At least all this smoothness and drinkability (yeah, I know it’s not a real word) makes my burps feel cleaner and less harsh.

If you were to have your own personal Pepsi Challenge blind taste test, you could definitely tell the difference between the Throwback versions and the regular versions. I could taste a difference and, despite my belief that the real sugar might be muting the flavor, I definitely prefer the Throwback versions because they have a cleaner and crisper taste than their HFCS cousins.

Unfortunately for me, the Pepsi Throwback and the Mountain Dew Throwback are only here for a limited time, so I’m going to start hoarding them in 3…2…1.

(Nutrition Facts – 1 can – Pepsi Throwback – 150 calories, 0 grams of fat, 40 milligrams of sodium, 40 grams of carbohydrates, 40 grams of sugar, 0 grams of protein and 38 milligrams of sweet, sweet caffeine. Mountain Dew Throwback – 170 calories, 0 grams of fat, 50 milligrams of sodium, 44 grams of carbohydrates, 44 grams of sugar, 0 grams of protein and 54 milligrams of sweet, sweet caffeine.)

Item: Pepsi Throwback and Mountain Dew Throwback
Price: FREE
Size: 12 ounces
Purchased at: Received from marketing firm
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Pepsi Throwback)
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Mountain Dew Throwback)
Pros: Cleaner and crisper than their HFCS cousins. Sweetened with real sugar. No HFCS. No bite. Easy to drink. Makes my burps feel less harsh. Sweet, sweet caffeine.
Cons: Dear Lord, they have a lot of sugar. Only here for a limited time. Some people might mistake the smoothness of the sodas as being flat. I miss Crystal Pepsi and Pepsi Holiday Spice. Getting your mugshot posted on The Smoking Gun. Disco.

NEWS: Kettle Brand Likey the Spicy With Their Jalapeno Potato Chips

Marvo 18 Comments

Hot off the heels of their Death Valley Chipotle Potato Chips, Kettle Brand recently introduced their Jalapeno flavored chips, which they describe as, “Striking a perfect balance between fresh, well-rounded flavor and the simple spicy bite of green jalapeno peppers.”

Being a fan of Kettle Brand Potato Chips and jalapenos (I once drank the juice from a jar of pickled jalapenos for two dollars), I’m eager to give these a try. Look for it in grocery and hippie natural food stores nationwide. They will be available in 2 oz., 5 oz., and 9 oz. bags.

A one-ounce serving contains 150 calories, 9 grams of fat, 1 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1 gram polyunsaturated fat, 7 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 200 milligrams of sodium, 400 milligrams of potassium, 15 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 1 gram of sugar and 2 grams of protein.