If you wear this on your feet or hands, I will ask you if I can sniff your nails. It’s not a fetish or anything weird like that. It’ll get weird when I ask you if you happen to have the Cheetos nail polish on you, and if you do, ask if I can take an unusually long sniff that’s so lengthy that it makes you uncomfortable. (Spotted by Robbie at Claire’s.)
SPOTTED (SEASONAL EDITION): 10/20/2022
Here are some new seasonal products found on store shelves by your fellow readers. If you’ve tried any of them, share your thoughts in the comments.
(Spotted by RaveGyrl at Sam’s Club.)
(Spotted by Robbie at Target.)
(Spotted by Robbie at Target.)
(Spotted by Robbie at Target.)
(Spotted by Robbie at Costco.)
(Spotted by Robbie at Central Market.)
(Spotted by Robbie at World Market.)
(Spotted by Robbie at Central Market.)
(Spotted by Robbie at World Market.)
SPOTTED: Hidden Valley Ranch Bugles
Is this new? Google tells me there was/is a ranch flavor, but not Hidden Valley Ranch branded. I guess I’ll believe at the unusually large “NEW!” ribbon at the top. (Spotted by Amanda Y at Kroger.)
REVIEW: Pizza Hut Melts
Pizza Hut’s new Melts appear to be its attempt to offer a menu item that’s similar to Papa John’s Papadias, which I assume have been popular since they’re still around and now can be crusted with cheese or pepperoni. They’re both basically pizza sandwiches for one person. Although, if you’re a Pizza Hut PHan (I assume that’s what they’re called), you might think Papadias are Papa John’s take on the P’Zone. But that’s another story for another never.
Pizza Hut says the Melts feature two slices of its Thin N’ Crispy crust loaded with toppings and cheese, folded over using basic crust origami, and baked to melty perfection. It’s available in four varieties — Pepperoni Lover’s, Meat Lover’s, Chicken Bacon Parmesan, and Buffalo Chicken — but I only purchased the first three listed for this review.
(No disrespect, Buffalo Chicken. While Melts are made for one, they have the nutrition numbers for three. Yes, I did buy three of the four, but I guess 79 total grams of saturated fat is my limit.)
Also, each one comes with a dipping sauce — ranch for the chicken varieties and marinara for the other two.
The top crust is sprinkled with parmesan oregano seasoning, which is something I didn’t expect nor something I read in the press release. It adds a little cheesy and herbacious flavor if you decide to take bites sans the dipping sauce, but I don’t recommend skipping the marinara or ranch. (I’ll bring that up later.) The top is also pleasantly crispy, but not so much when it comes to the unseasoned bottom crust.
When I peeled back the carb cover, it was surprising that the filling wasn’t the equivalent of smooshing two fully-topped pizza slices together. So “loaded with toppings and cheese” might not be totally accurate. Of course, there’s a chance that mine were made wrong.
Even though they weren’t what I hoped “loaded” would be, there still was a noticeable amount of toppings and cheese, and eating one was filling. But the dipping sauces are necessary to turn the Melts into flavorful experiences since there’s none in them. Without the marinara or ranch, these are a bit bland, especially the Chicken Bacon Parmesan.
Pizza Hut’s Melts seem to be the chain’s way to sell you folded pizza slices, and there’s nothing really unique flavor-wise, especially with the Pepperoni and Meat Lover’s varieties.
Now I can see how some might think I’m down on these, but I really did enjoy their crispiness and flavors when the sauce was involved. However, while great to experience once, I’m not sure I’d buy these over a cheaper and less nutritional eye-popping Personal Pan Pizza if I want something meant for one from Pizza Hut.
Purchased Price: $9.49 each*
Size: n/a
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 melt) Pepperoni – 1150 calories, 62 grams of fat, 28 grams of saturated fat, 1.5 grams of trans fat, 165 milligrams of cholesterol, 2660 milligrams of sodium, 95 grams of carbohydrates, 8 grams of fiber, 17 grams of sugar, and 53 grams of protein. Meat Lover’s – 1100 calories, 59 grams of fat, 24 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 130 milligrams of cholesterol, 2700 milligrams of sodium, 93 grams of carbohydrates, 7 grams of fiber, 17 grams of sugar, and 49 grams of protein. Chicken Bacon Parmesan – 1170 calories, 70 grams of fat, 27 grams of saturated fat, 1.5 grams of trans fat, 130 milligrams of cholesterol, 2400 milligrams of sodium, 86 grams of carbohydrates, 5 grams of fiber, 11 grams of sugar, and 49 grams of protein.
*Because I live on a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, things are a bit pricier here. You’ll probably pay less than I did. The advertised price is $6.99.
NOT FOOD: Taste Beauty Cinnamon Toast Crunch, Lucky Charms, and Nerds Cosmetics
Now I want some Cheerios cosmetics that makes me look cheery. Or maybe some Basic 4 Cereal cosmetics. (Spotted by Robbie at Big Lots.)