REVIEW: Burger King Spider-Verse Whopper

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Burger King, Burger King
Get a load of this burger thing,
Crimson bun, Whopper-sized,
Order with a side of fries,

Look out!
Here’s the… New “Spider-verse” Whopper.

Yeah, that ended with a whimper. Sorry, the lyrics aren’t as clever as BK’s current theme song, WHOPPER, WHOPPER, WHOPPER, WHOPPER, WHOPPER *repeat x10*

Before I review Burger King’s new “Spider-verse” Whopper, I just wanna give my quick review of 2018’s “Spider-man: Into the Spider-verse.” 10 out of 10. Certified banger. Best Spider-man movie ever made. No notes. If you haven’t seen it, find whoever is streaming it, and fire it up.

While you’re at it, flame broil up Burger King’s new “Spider-verse” Whopper, a burger that somehow almost lived up to the hype of the movie.

I say “somehow” because, in reality, there isn’t much difference from a tried-and-true Whopper here, but that’s the thing, reality is only a perception. This is a multiverse Whopper.

The obvious eye-catching draw of this burger is the beet-dyed red bun. As far as “photo versus expectations” goes, I gotta say, the real thing ended up looking way better than my Spidey sense thought it would. It tastes like a normal bun, but I swear it was a bit more “toothsome.” Perhaps mine was just mildly stale, like the current Marvel Cinematic Universe. (Sony paid me to say that.)

The other key difference from a standard Whopper is that American cheese is swapped out for melty Swiss. Why? I pondered that myself. Is Miles Morales a big fan of Swiss cheese? Is there a Swiss Spiderman out there in the Spider-verse? The only logical explanation I could come up with is that Swiss cheese famously has holes and the Spidey supervillain The Spot has a key role in the new Spider-verse sequel. I think I cracked the case. (Trypophobics need not Google “The Spot.”)

Anyway, I actually think the Swiss compliments the burger really well. It gave it a milder and slightly saltier taste than the usual Kraft single-esque piece of rubber.

It’s been a long time since I’ve sat down and eaten a Whopper AT the home of said Whopper, and I enjoyed it thoroughly.

I do have one minor complaint though. Why did Burger King just stop at a red bun? It has dabbled with flavored buns and hot sauces in the past. I think this bun should have had a *THWIP!* of heat, or there should have been a sauce component. They could have called it “Radioactive Spider-bite Sauce” or something. Then again, maybe it’s best to limit the number of spider references. Some people might think they’re eating bugs.

Either way, I love the movie, I really liked this burger, and I can’t wait to watch the sequel next week. You have until June 11th to try the burger. After that, it’ll be gone like Uncle Ben – the rice guy and Peter Parker’s dearly departed guardian.

Oh, there are also cool little Miles Morales-themed Burger King crowns. I won’t lie; I snagged one. Two. I snagged two. I’m giving one away, I swear.

This was fun. Maybe next time BK can do a Venom-themed burger with black buns and … oh wait, no! No, they can’t do that again, lest they want everyone to expel their own symbiote.

Ok, on that gross note, I’m gonna websling outta here. Try the burger!

Purchased Price: $5.00 (Special Monday only price in the App – a steep $8.19 otherwise)
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 795 calories, 54 grams of fat, 14 grams of saturated fat, 2 grams of trans fat, 115 milligrams of cholesterol, 1700 milligrams of sodium, 56 grams of carbohydrates, 5 grams of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and 38 grams of protein.

SPOTTED: Cheetos Flamin’ Hot Smoky Ghost Pepper Puffs

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Another mouth burning, Flamin’ Hot Walmart-exclusive from Cheetos. But when will we taste Scorpion or 7 Pot Pepper Cheetos Puffs? (Spotted by Sage G at Walmart.)

If you’re out shopping and see new products, snap a picture of them, and send them in via an email (theimpulsivebuy@gmail.com) with where you found them and “Spotted” in the subject line. Also, if you want to send in photos and are wondering if we’ve already covered something or if they’re new, don’t worry about it. Let us worry about it.

SPOTTED: Krispy Kreme Fan Favs Assorted Doughnuts

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Two Original Glazed, two Strawberries & Kreme, and two Key Lime Pie Doughnuts. (Spotted by Robbie at Walmart.)

If you’re out shopping and see new products, snap a picture of them, and send them in via an email (theimpulsivebuy@gmail.com) with where you found them and “Spotted” in the subject line. Also, if you want to send in photos and are wondering if we’ve already covered something or if they’re new, don’t worry about it. Let us worry about it.

SPOTTED: Van Leeuwen Summer 2023 Flavors at Walmart

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Van Leeuwen Limited Edition Arizona Green Tea with Honeycomb Ice Cream
Van Leeuwen Limited Edition Banan Cream Pie Ice Cream
Van Leeuwen Limited Edition Key Lime Pie Ice Cream
Van Leeuwen Limited Edition Tiramisu Ice Cream
Van Leeuwen Limited Edition Kiwi Burst Ice Cream
Van Leeuwen Limited Edition Summer Peach Crisp Ice Cream

I could’ve sworn the Tiramisu one was part of another group of Walmart flavors. But I definitely know Summer Peach Crisp is a returning flavor. (Spotted by Justin B at Walmart.)

If you’re out shopping and see new products, snap a picture of them, and send them in via an email (theimpulsivebuy@gmail.com) with where you found them and “Spotted” in the subject line. Also, if you want to send in photos and are wondering if we’ve already covered something or if they’re new, don’t worry about it. Let us worry about it.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Churro Kit Kat

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It’s always the summer of something now. Last year was the Summer of Street Corn, if I remember correctly. I think we had the Summer of Matcha the summer before that. Watermelon also had its own summer at some point recently, though you could argue that EVERY summer is the Summer of Watermelon.

My point being George Costanza was way ahead of this trend when he declared 1997 “The Summer of George.” Wait, that wasn’t my point. My point is maybe 2023 will be the Summer of Churro.

Ben & Jerry’s recently brought Churray for Churros to store shelves, and now Kit Kat is following suit with its take on the cinnamony-sugary fried-dough classic. Associate Kit Kat Brand Manager Alex Herzog recently told Food & Wine magazine, “We hope that every bite of the buttery, churro flavor and familiar crispy crunch of our wafers unlocks memories of the delightful experience of enjoying freshly baked churros from the boardwalk stand, amusement park, or the local fair.”

This is a pretty big goal from a candy bar, even one as renowned as the Kit Kat. (Also, full disclosure — I’ve never had a churro at any of these places. A funnel cake, sure, but not a Churro. Note to self: pitch Funnel Cake Kit Kat to Alex Herzog.) So did the R&D geniuses manage to evoke state fairs, amusement parks, or trips to the boardwalk?

I mean… no. It’s an okay candy bar, but those are lofty aspirations.

For starters, I didn’t really get anything that could be construed as “buttery” with this bar. At first taste, you get the familiar waxy coating of a Kit Kat, only it’s a little more vanilla-ish, or maybe white chocolatey than the standard chocolate shell. After a few chews, I got a very mild cinnamon flourish, but it’s gone just as quickly as it appeared.

And really, that’s the biggest miss of this bar; had they gone heavy with the cinnamon, it might’ve really been something special. Instead, it’s very much an “eh, if you’re a Kit Kat aficionado, you’ll wanna try, but temper your expectations,” or if you’re only “a casual Kit Katarian” (just made that up, but we’re going with it) and you’re selective about your candy intake for health and wellness purposes, I probably wouldn’t bother. The 220 calories here would be better spent on an actual part of a churro or a few bites from a funnel cake.

Regardless, I am excited to usher in the Summer of Churro. I wonder what Pringles has planned?

Purchased Price: $1.32
Size: 1.5 oz bar
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 package) 220 calories, 12 grams of fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 7 grams of saturated fat, 0 mg of cholesterol, 30 milligrams of sodium, 27 grams of total carbohydrates, 20 gram of total sugars, 0 grams of fiber, and 2 grams of protein.