REVIEW: Cheetos Mac ‘N Cheese Cups

Cheetos Mac  N Cheese Cups

I’m as angry red as the Flamin’ Hot version of Cheetos Mac ‘N Cheese (there are also Bold & Cheesy and Cheesy Jalapeno varieties).

For years, I’ve been longing for Cheetos-flavored seasoning to be bottled so that we all can sprinkle some Cheetle on whatever our taste buds desire. But here we are with a Cheetos-flavored powdery substance, but it’s not bottled. Instead, I have to mix it with cooked noodles and water to make mac ’n cheese in a cup.

WHY CAN’T WE HAVE NICE THINGS, LIKE BOTTLED CHEETOS SEASONING!

(Oh, Cheetle is the official term for what we’ve all called Cheeto Dust. Since Cheetos sent me these, I thought I’d be courteous and use the correct terminology.)

Can you imagine topping pasta with Cheetos seasoning instead of grated parmesan cheese? Or maybe put it on McDonald’s French fries, scrambled eggs, potato chips, hash browns, chili, anything from Taco Bell, anything made by Chef Boyardee, a Costco hot dog, Costco pizza, Costco rotisserie chicken, the frozen cauliflower crust pizza I always pick up from Costco…

Sorry, as you can see, I’ve imagined a life with Cheetos seasoning for a long time, and I often shop at Costco.

Cheetos Mac ’N Cheese is available in these single-serve cups, but they’re also sold as box dinners that involve doing more than adding water and mixing.

Cheetos Bold  Cheesy Mac  N Cheese Cups

The Bold & Cheesy variety is pretty much the adjective-heavy way of saying original Cheetos flavor. Does it taste like the beloved snack? It does, but it’s a bit unsatisfying to get the famous cheesiness this way. I’ll explain more after I go through all the varieties. But this one is my favorite of the three.

Cheetos Cheesy Jalapeno Mac  N Cheese

Cheesy Jalapeno is a Cheetos variety I’ve eaten twice, but I can’t remember the last time I had it or how it tastes. So I don’t know if this mac ’n cheese’s flavor comes close to it. It has a strong jalapeno scent and taste that’s slightly more potent than the cheese. It’s also a tad spicy, but not as much as the Flamin’ Hot one. As I ate it, I kept thinking chile con queso.

Cheetos Flamin Hot Mac  N Cheese

As for the Flamin’ Hot Mac ’N Cheese, it was, unfortunately, disappointing. It made me sweat a little, but I don’t know if it was the hot noodles or Flamin’ Hot seasoning that caused it. Also, it started off tasty, but about halfway through the cup, it became a bit bland, and the spiciness kind of fizzled. Also, and this might be just me, the angry red/Swedish Fish/B-movie blood color is a little off-putting.

The Bold & Cheesy and Cheesy Jalapeno varieties are decent, but with all three, it’s like I’m eating a cheesy Cup Noodles instead of mac ’n cheese. Look, I’ve had Kraft Macaroni and Cheese Cups, so I kind of expected the slightly watery texture of the sauce. But I feel like something that’s Cheetos flavored deserves better because most variations of the snack are addictive and hard to put down. I can’t say the same about these.

Cheetos Flamin Hot Mac  N Cheese Powder

They could be improved, though. Most of the appeal for Cheetos is its cheesiness, but there’s also the crunch factor, which these lack. Yes, we could add some of the crunchy snack ourselves, but it would be easier for Frito-Lay to include some crushed Cheetos that we could use like bread crumbs to top the mac ‘n cheese. I’m pretty sure the folks there have no problem getting access to tons of the stuff.

As I mentioned earlier, Cheetos Mac ’N Cheese is also available in boxes that call for butter and milk to prepare them, which seems like you’ll get a better end result. So I’d recommend purchasing those instead of these single-serve cups.

DISCLOSURE: I received free samples of the product. (Thanks, Cheetos!) Doing so did not influence my review.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 2.32 oz cup (Bold & Cheesy), 2.25 oz cup (Cheesy Jalapeno), 2.11 oz cup (Flamin’ Hot)
Purchased at: Received from Cheetos
Rating: 6 out of 10 (Bold & Cheesy), 6 out of 10 (Cheesy Jalapeno), 4 out of 10 (Flamin’ Hot)
Nutrition Facts: (1 package) Bold & Cheesy – 240 calories, 5 grams of fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 690 milligrams of sodium, 43 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 5 grams of sugar, and 7 grams of protein. Cheesy Jalapeno

REVIEW: Smartfood Cap’n Crunch’s Crunch Berries Popcorn Mix

Smartfood Cap n Crunch s Crunch Berries Popcorn Mix Bag

When I first heard about Smartfood’s Cap’n Crunch’s Crunch Berries Popcorn Mix, I thought, “Why isn’t there a Cap’n Crunch Kettle Corn Mix?”

But after putting more thought than anyone should about the idea, I realized, “Do I REALLY want popcorn kernel hulls lodged into whatever scratches are made by the Cap’n Crunch cereal?”

Nope.

This less hurtful snack combines Cap’n Crunch’s Crunch Berries from Quaker, owned by PepsiCo, with berry-flavored popcorn from Smartfood, also owned by PepsiCo. Because of the added kernel seasoning, it would be difficult to recreate this combo after its limited time is up with merely a bag of plain microwave popcorn and box of Oops All Berries.

But this is tasty enough that it should come back, or be a permanent addition to the Smartfood lineup.

Smartfood Cap n Crunch s Crunch Berries Popcorn Mix Bag Closeup

Sadly, the popcorn itself isn’t colored like rainbow popcorn. Instead, at a quick glance, they look like plain popcorn. But there is a seasoning layer that makes the popped kernels look like they spent some time suntanning on the deck of the S.S. Guppy. That coating provides a noticeable amount of berry flavor and light saltiness. But it’s not enough to make the popcorn alone a satisfying snack or a product that should be added to the Smartfood lineup.

The Crunch Berries amp up the berry flavor to a level you’d get if you were, well, eating Crunch Berries cereal. I know. It’s a little anticlimactic. Maybe if I rephrase it with ship-speak? The cereal’s flavor hits the bow, stem, port, and starboard sides of my tongue full steam ahead with berry. It’s berry good.

While I find this snack to be wonderful, there is a minor, but correctable issue. When I first started eating it by blindly grabbing some from its bag, I’d feel for the cereal pieces and then feel for some popcorn before pulling out my hand. But almost every time, my fingers would pull out only popcorn. I guess the cereal piece I felt for slipped away somehow. Or I might have the worst luck or useless fingers. But being able to see the cereal pieces, pick one up, and then grab some popcorn helped tremendously.

While Smartfood Cap’n Crunch’s Crunch Berries Popcorn Mix tastes pretty much like Crunch Berries, I did love having the two crunchy textures of popcorn and cereal at the same time in my mouth. Yes, this does seem like an odd combination, but I’m happy to report it works well.

DISCLOSURE: I received free samples of the product. (Thanks, PepsiCo!) Doing so did not influence my review, although it totally seems like it. But I assure you it did not.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 6 1/4 oz bag
Purchased at: Received from PepsiCo
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 3/4 cups) 140 calories, 6 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 110 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 6 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Doritos Mountain Dew (Australia)

Mountain Dew Doritos  Australia Package

What are Doritos Mountain Dew?

Mountain-Dew-flavored Doritos from Australia – the land of megabats, and well, mega everything. Now they’re doing America in a big way, rolling an iconic snack combo into one product best enjoyed wearing a sleeveless flannel and cutoff shorts, in a monster truck speeding down a 2-lane road surrounded by wheat fields.

Mountain Dew Doritos  Australia Soda 2

How are they?

These were far better than I expected. I figured the citrus would work – there’s already lime-flavored chips in stores that are excellent. The sweetness was the question mark – Mountain Dew is SO sweet – could they pull off the right sweet/savory combo?

It ended up working really well because of the lemon-lime, I think. It gives it the tang and mouth-puckering quality that keeps it from being ALL sweet. It also gave it a bit of the sparkle of a carbonated beverage. Not exactly the bubbly sensation, but the light, bright citric acid that’s in nearly every soda.

These were just as addictive as any chip, but the novelty of the sweet are tart flavors was extra and I loved it.

Mountain Dew Doritos  Australia Chips 3

Anything else you need to know?

I’ve been told these chips DID exist in the US, back in 2008 as “Doritos Quest” mystery flavor. I completely missed those, but I would’ve paid more attention if they were called Doritos Mountain Dew. My head whipped right around this time, but “Doritos Quest” does nothing for me.

Apparently, there was also Doritos-flavored Mountain Dew called DEWitos in 2014 – tested in select colleges in the country. Comment below if you tried it!

WHY has no one here in the US of A thought to release a combo pack of Doritos Mountain Dew AND Dewitos? COME ON, AMERICA! Let’s get our heads in the junk food game here!

Mountain Dew Doritos  Australia Zesty 4

Conclusion:

Try them! They’re fun, they’re weird, they taste good, and they’re AMERICA. Frito-Lay, we need these in every store here in the US!

Purchased Price: $25.00 plus shipping
Size: 80g bag
Purchased at: Desert Drinks & Exotics
Rating: 10 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (27g) 139 calories, 6.9 grams of fat, 0.7grams of saturated fat, 0.1 gram of trans fat, 41 milligrams of sodium, 16.9 grams of carbohydrates, 2.1 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Volcano Queso and Scorpion BBQ Takis

Limited Edition Volcano Queso and Scorpion BBQ Takis

Because Photoshop exists, I will not be posting on the internet pictures of my face with my blue-green colored tongue to show Limited Edition Volcano Queso and Scorpion BBQ Takis’ new color-changing effect.

But I will post my thoughts about how two limited time only tortilla chips taste.

Limited Edition Volcano Queso Takis

Volcano Queso is described as habanero pepper cheese flavored tortilla chips. With it including habanero, I was expecting the spiciness to be a bit more extreme. But I found the heat level to be less than anything with Flamin’ Hot seasoning. The cheese seasoning tastes like nacho cheese, so when combined with the habanero, the combo is like chili con queso, which is expected with a name like Volcano Queso.

Not having a habanero-level of heat was, at first, a little disappointing. But after eating a few more, I didn’t care about that because I realized these chips are fantastic just the way they are.

Limited Edition Scorpion BBQ Takis

While the Volcano Queso met my cheesy expectations, Scorpion BBQ was **researching scorpions** all metasoma, no venom. I assumed with the word “Scorpion” in its name that the snack would provide some burn. Instead, they have a slight kick.

No, “slight kick” is too strong of a phrase to accurately describe it.

It’s as if I was moving around rocks, and underneath one of those rocks was a scorpion, which freaked me out and caused me to accidentally drop the stone on the scorpion, squashing it. The feeling I notice with these Takis is as if the ghost of that scorpion stung me with its ghost tail, which made me think, “Did I feel something? Nah.”

The barbecue flavor is smoky, slightly sweet, and if you eat enough, you’ll probably also feel as if you might’ve gotten tapped by a ghost scorpion, but it’s also kind of blah. Scorpion BBQ was definitely a letdown in terms of spiciness and flavor.

Now let’s go back to the color-changing effect. I understand having my tongue turn blue-green definitely contrasts the color of the rolled tortilla chips. But I wish the Volcano Queso turned my tongue orange and the Scorpion BBQ made my mouth black.

Overall, get the Volcano Queso Takis if you love chili con queso, but you can skip Scorpion BBQ, even if you love BBQ.

Purchased Price: Way too much on eBay
Size: 9.9 oz bags
Purchased at: eBay
Rating: 8 out of 10 (Volcano Queso), 5 out of 10 (Scorpion BBQ)
Nutrition Facts: (1 oz) Volcano Queso – 140 calories, 8 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 1 gram of sugar, and 2 grams of protein. Scorpion BBQ – 140 calories, 8 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 140 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 1 gram of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Lay’s Flavor Icons Potato Chips

Lay s Flavor Icons Potato Chips Bags

This is one of my favorite times of the year.

Seriously, I love it when Lay’s does its big multi-flavor rollouts, whether it be the jealousy-inducing “Do Us a Flavor” finalists, the recent music inspired flavors, or its “Tastes of America” campaign that these new “Flavor Icons” seem to be a continuation of, I’ve pretty much enjoyed every single special chip they’ve put out.

This year, the “Flavor Icons” are chips inspired by foods from famous American eateries. As an East Coast guy, I’ve personally dined at two of the five, so I guess I can say I have a frame of reference on a couple of these flavors.

I’ll rapid-fire through these reviews starting with the two places I’ve eaten at:

Lay’s Kettle Cooked Grimaldi’s New York Style Pizza (Brooklyn, NY)

Lay s Kettle Cooked Flavor Icons New York Style Pizza Potato Chips

Grimaldi’s is a chain of pizza places that originated where I originated, Brooklyn. I haven’t had it in years, but I do recall thinking the pizza was a little overrated. Needless to say, it’s a super famous NYC pizza joint, and that was a blasphemous opinion to anyone I mentioned it to.

Anyway, these chips hit me like a massive nostalgia bomb when I popped open the bag and got a whiff of the old Keebler Pizzeria Chips. I was probably in elementary school last time I had those, but it all came back to me.

Speaking of memories, these hit me right in my taste receptors because WOW(!!!), they tasted exactly like how I remember Grimaldi’s. The chain makes a very saucy pizza, and they definitely gave their secret recipe to Frito Lay. I’d describe it as “gourmet,” with all the ingredients you’d expect from a pizza sauce – onion, garlic, oregano, basil, olive oil, etc.

I’m more of a cheese guy, so I loved the fresh mozzarella flavor and tiny bit of parmesan on the backend. I do not think they needed to be kettle-style, but it reminded me of a crisp pizza crust, so it worked. Pizza is usually hit or miss in chip form. These may be the best pizza chips I’ve ever had.

Purchased Price: $2.50
Size: 7 3/4 oz bag
Purchased at: ShopRite
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (18 chips) 150 calories, 9 grams of fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 180 milligrams of sodium, 16 grams of total carbohydrates, 1 gram of total sugars, 1 gram of fiber, and 2 grams of protein.

Lay’s Geno’s Philly Cheesesteak (I’ll give ya a hint, PA)

Lay s Flavor Icons Philly Cheesesteak Potato Chips

I’ll tread lightly because I don’t know how to talk about Philly cheesesteaks without breaking the rules. Last time I went to Philly, I got a steak at Geno’s… then I walked across the street and got one at Pat’s, so I don’t have a preference. Cheesesteaks are just awesome.

These chips start out tasting just like Cheddar and Sour Cream, but as I went on, I started to get a “meat” flavor I guess you’d classify as beefy. Beef and even a hint of peppers remain as an aftertaste. So, it starts with the cheese “whiz” (did I do that right?) and some onion, and ends with the beef and peppers. It’s actually pretty complex, and I thought these were excellent.

Purchased Price: $2.50
Size: 7 3/4 oz bag
Purchased at: ShopRite
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 15 chips) 160 calories, 10 grams of fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 210 milligrams of sodium, 15 grams of total carbohydrates, 1 gram of total sugars, 1 gram of fiber, and 2 grams of protein.

Lay’s Wavy El Torito Carnitas Street Taco (Marina Del Ray, CA)

Lay s Wavy Flavor Icons Canitas Street Taco Potato Chips

Now we get to the places I’ve never been to. Carnitas were my go-to Mexican order before I decided to stop eating pork. Well, I broke my resolution because these chips actually have pork listed as an ingredient. They definitely taste like charred pulled Mexican-style pork, albeit weakly.

They start with a very slight sweetness that I attributed to the sauce El Torito must use to simmer the pork. There’s a little blast of lime and fresh chopped onion in there too. There’s a weird, dull “dryness” to these that I persuaded myself was supposed to mimic the tortilla. These don’t POP as much the rest of the lineup, but they’re still pretty tasty, and I love that they’re Wavy.

Purchased Price: $2.50
Size: 7 3/4 oz bag
Purchased at: ShopRite
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (15 chips) 150 calories, 10 grams of fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 210 milligrams of sodium, 15 grams of total carbohydrates, 1 gram of total sugars, 1 gram of fiber, and 1 gram of protein.

Lay’s Cocina Azul Chile Relleno (Albuquerque, NM)

Lay s Flavor Icons Chile Relleno Potato Chips

Full transparency, I didn’t even know what this was – some kinda egg and cheese mix stuffed inside a pepper? Sure, why not, that sounds good. Well, after eating the chip, I’m gonna make it my duty to seek out the actual dish.

These chips smell and taste like a light queso dip. The chile pepper tastes both crisp and vibrant while giving off the perfect amount of heat. They’re not really too spicy, which I appreciated. There is also definitely an “eggy” taste, like cheesy scrambled eggs that peek out towards the finish. These are probably the saltiest of the bunch, and I imagine some may think they’re too mild overall, but I’m a big fan.

Purchased Price: $1.89
Size: 2 5/8 oz bag
Purchased at: 7-Eleven
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (15 chips) 160 calories, 10 grams of fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 180 milligrams of sodium, 15 grams of total carbohydrates, 1 gram of total sugars, 1 gram of fiber, and 2 grams of protein.

Lay’s Party Fowl Nashville Hot Chicken (Guess Where, TN)

Lay s Flavor Icons Nashville Hot Chicken Potato Chips

Now I’ve had plenty of hot chicken in my life, but I’ve never had Nashville-specific hot chicken, so forgive me if I say anything out of line.

As you’d expect, these are the hottest chip in the bunch. I’d put them slightly under the standard “Flamin’ Hot” heat, which keeps them very snackable. These are undeniably chicken-flavored, but they mostly tasted like crispy chicken skin to me.

They had that “dryness” that I mentioned in the Carnitas review, that I can’t quite find a better word for. I like it, though. The hot sauce flavor doesn’t have any particular ingredient I can pinpoint. Google tells me they usually use cayenne and brown sugar, but I didn’t necessarily get that, nor were they listed as ingredients.

There’s a pickle on the bag, but I don’t believe this has any pickle flavor. I would have loved a little splash of dill, but not a huge deal.

Purchased Price: $2.50
Size: 7 3/4 oz bag
Purchased at: ShopRite
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (15 chips) 150 calories, 10 grams of fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 190 milligrams of sodium, 15 grams of total carbohydrates, 1 gram of total sugars, 1 gram of fiber, and 2 grams of protein.

Lay s Flavor Icons Potato Chips 2

So, there ya have ’em. I pretty much loved all five, but a couple were near perfect. I can’t be super confident that three are perfectly accurate to the specific restaurant dish they’re copying, but judging from the two I know, I bet they’re pretty spot on.

Maybe I’m just an easy (Frito) lay, but I’m really impressed. These might be the most complex flavor profiles Lay’s have tackled to date, and they nailed ’em. Basically, every intended ingredient of each dish came through for me. That never happens.

According to the bags you have until 9/10/20 to try these. Don’t drag your feet. Otherwise, you’ll have to drive coast to coast to try the real things.

Oh, and if anyone from Frito Lay is reading this, I dare you to make my last flavor submission – Onion Knish with Spicy Mustard!