Tag: McDonald’s

Do you trust your taste buds?

It’s an honest question; and no, not in the existential crisis proceeding when you learn that all the loops in Froot Loops taste the same (they do) but in drawing on a memory of something you ate in the past and comparing it to something you ate today.

I bring this up because last year McDonald’s released its Sweet N’ Spicy Honey BBQ Glazed Tenders, and I liked them. This year, they released what seems like a similar product — Spicy BBQ Glazed Tenders — but I can’t say the same thing.

McDonald’s is advertising the Spicy BBQ Glazed Tenders as “smoky,” “juicy,” and “mouthwatering.” They are none of the preceding, and certainly not worthy of the “whoo!” the McDonald’s website claims you’ll say after eating them.

“Meh,” perhaps. “Woo,” please.

For starters, they’re not much to look at. It may be fast food, but it’s also 2019, and when your premium tenders are broken and sagging in an oversized box, that says something about preparation.

It also says something about your preparation — and maybe even the conception — when my tenders are soggy and have little crunch when ordered during the Noon to 1 p.m. lunch hour. They had no genuine crisp or crackle in the breading. Inside, they were dryer than McDonald’s tenders I’ve had in the past, with none of the succulence white meat needs to be anything other than boring.

But perhaps the biggest letdown was the sauce. Where last year’s Sweet N’ Spicy Honey BBQ Glazed Tenders nailed the Honey BBQ flavor, the BBQ sauce on this year’s Spicy BBQ tenders leaves much to be desired. It’s not as sweet or bold as last year’s version but carries the same ho-hum level of spiciness — a little cayenne on the back end, some garlic powder, maybe enough black pepper to let you know that hey, we didn’t lie entirely in our marketing.

I tend to treat chicken tenders like pizza, falling back on the theory that they can never be truly repulsive. But I’m also a big believer in opportunity cost, and as the list of McDonald’s menu items I would have rather spent money on grows, my relative enjoyment of a disappointing product dissipates. My suggestion? Get the buttermilk tenders and sauce them separately. You may like them.

Purchased Price: $4.59
Size: 4-count
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (4-count) 580 calories, 27 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 105 milligrams of cholesterol, 1950 milligrams of sodium, 44 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 15 grams of sugar, and 41 grams of protein.

If you’re like me, you’ve fallen down many a rabbit hole of International McDonald’s menu items. I’ve clicked through listicle after annoying listicle just yearning for the day America embraces the weirdness that the rest of the world gets to bask in daily.

Good thing for us, McDonald’s has introduced a new “Worldwide Favorites” menu. What say we go for a little trip across the pond?

The Grand McExtreme Bacon Burger comes courtesy of Spain and consists of a Quarter Pounder, Applewood Bacon, McBacon Sauce, slivered onions, and two slices of Gouda.

Quick questions – I thought Gouda was a Dutch cheese? Is it a staple of Spaniard diets? Is McDonald’s making stuff up?!

Anyway, the Gouda and McBacon Sauce were the ingredients I was most excited about. I’ve never had either on a fast food burger. I assumed they were what made this burger so extreme. So McExtreme!

The Gouda was mild, but there was just enough of that creamy, smoky flavor you’d want. It meshed really well. There are so many overpowering cheeses that could have ruined everything, so no matter where Gouda derives from, it was the right choice for this particular burger.

I’d take McBacon Sauce over ketchup on literally every burger going forward. It’s equal parts smoky, tangy, and well, bacon-y. It’s too bad they screwed me with only a small dollop. Every burger I buy is swimming in sauce. The one time I’d actually like that, I get a dab.

The rest of the ingredients were retreads, although I’ll say that not having a Quarter Pounder in a while really made me feel like I was eating a premium hamburger – at least by McDonald’s standards.

Applewood Bacon has become a can’t miss topping, so no complaints there.

The onions didn’t add much, so I ended up scraping most of them off. They should’ve used crispy fried onions.

I wondered why they didn’t do anything fancy with the sesame seed bun, but I got a nice fresh one at least.

The most impressive thing about this burger was how clean it somehow was. The box was initially oily and gross (I guess that was from the bacon? Maybe some Gouda run-off?), but the burger as a whole was shockingly easy to eat. That was likely exclusive to my experience, but nothing fell off the burger, and I didn’t even need a napkin, which is unheard of. I imagine that’s how Europeans like their burgers.

All in all, this was a creative, tasty burger, which is great because, besides the Stroopwafel McFlurry, the other Worldwide Favorites are boring. Cheese fries? Mozzarella chicken sandwich? Meh. What makes mozzarella Canadian? McDonald’s is just randomly assigning cheeses to countries!

Despite the mystery grease, the Grand McExtreme is one of the better fast food burgers I’ve had in ages. Is it distinctly Spanish? I couldn’t tell ya, but no matter what, Me encanta! (This is Google Spanish for “I’m Loving it,” so blame them if it’s wrong.)

Purchased Price: $6.60
Size: N/A
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 750 calories, 47 grams of fat, 18 grams of saturated fat, 145 milligrams of cholesterol, 1310 milligrams of sodium, 38 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 8 grams of sugar, and 43 grams of protein.

I am of the opinion that McDonald’s outside of the states is better.

One of my all-time favorite fast food sandwiches is the McSpicy in Asia. Now one of my all-time favorite treats is the Stroopwaffel McFlurry from the Netherlands! But, the best is part is that I can get the latter here (for a limited time unless you visit the Chicago HQ McDonald’s locations which carries international items regularly.)

If you’re not familiar with a stroopwafel, it’s a euro-phenom. It’s basically a genius way to eat a cookie for breakfast; they’re very thin (even thinner than Oreo Thins!) waffle wafers sandwiching caramel. The waffle itself has the cinnamon goodness of a freshly made waffle cone, but it’s much more pliable, delicate because it bends with the caramel without crumbling. I appreciate McDonald’s went with the most well-known maker Daelmans.

But, you won’t find a whole cookie! The treat itself has broken up pieces of one blended with caramel and vanilla soft serve.

Because I may have been the first person order this at the location I went to, I was able to overhear the details about making the sausage, um, soft serve treat. The snack size comes with two scoops of cookie bits and a regular comes with three. Both get one pump of caramel.

The cookie pieces ate like caramel bits that beautifully stuccoed the vanilla soft serve. They didn’t freeze up from the cold. Also, one scoop of bits was plenty generous as I thought there was a nice distribution throughout the treat.

The pump of caramel nicely enhanced the caramel in the stroopwafel but didn’t overtake it. However, I could tell the stuff in the cookie was better with notes of cinnamon and vanilla compared to the straight sugar of the confection that was pumped in.

Overall, if you love caramel, you’ll definitely enjoy this!

Purchased Price: $2.29
Size: Snack Size
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 480 calories, 13 grams of fat, 8 gram of saturated fat, 0.5 grams of trans fat, 230 milligrams of sodium, 81 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 57 grams of sugar, and 9 grams of protein.

For many years, I thought American fast food was a shining beacon of liberty, creativity, and ingenuity —- in short, everything that won two world wars, put a man on the moon, and bequeathed the world such celebrities as the Jonas Brothers.

Reality, a hip college-aged friend of mine tells me, is often disappointing, although I think she stole that from a movie. Such is the case when you consider the rather pedestrian domestic offerings of chains like McDonald’s in relation to its overseas menus. Thankfully, we get to bask in a little international culture for the summer, as the Golden Arches have rolled out its “Worldwide Favorites” menu.

The Tomato Mozzarella Chicken Sandwich, an import from Canada, suggests an especially light and summery offering. You can get the sandwich in either a grilled or crispy version but because you only live once and can drastically reduce said life through gluttony, I got both.

Structurally, the crispy chicken sandwich holds up better than the grilled. Mine was well presented with multiple leaves of lettuce and surprisingly fresh Roma tomato slices tucked into a toasted, buttered Artisan bun. The crispy chicken was plenty juicy on the inside and crispy on the outside — everything you would want it to be, but for some reason it tasted just okay.

The viscous tomato and herb sauce is less sweet or acidic than it probably should be, and what’s left is a garlicky sauce that doesn’t know what it wants to be. The mozzarella, warm but unmelted, cheesy but not milky, is serviceable. But like watching Canadian football, it’s not preferable.

I found that the grilled chicken version tastes better than the crispy one if only because there is a warm succulence to the grilled poultry that melts the cheese more completely than the crispy version.

The tomatoes and lettuce add a more pronounced relief to the protein and gooey cheese, but they also add structural instability. In rather cartoonish fashion, the contents of my sandwich squirted themselves almost completely free of the bun, of which the button half was basically useless. Also, there are onions on both sandwiches. They’re fine if not a little annoying.

Overall, the Tomato Mozzarella Chicken Sandwich is a little bit better than fine but not quite a solid good despite it’s obviously fresh ingredients and relatively sound engineering. If anything, the sandwich makes you appreciate the tried and true regular McDonald’s menu a bit more, while still cultivating a healthy curiosity for the warmth of drive-thrus on distant (or relatively close) foreign shores.

Purchased Price: $5.49
Size: N/A
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 700 calories (Crispy); 530 calories (Grilled) Full nutrition not available at publication time.

After the employee handed me the bag that contained my six-piece order of McDonald’s Donut Sticks (it’s also available with 12 pieces), I wondered if there were cameras around and I was being pranked. Because it was so light, it felt as if it contained only the obligatory napkins.

But after opening the bag, getting a sweet whiff of cinnamon sugar and not so sweet whiff of oil, and seeing six sticks staring back at me, my Punk’d fears subsided. I don’t know why I thought they’d be more substantial than they are.

The Donut Sticks are sweet golden-brown dough, sprinkled with cinnamon sugar, and made fresh every morning. They’re also a little disappointing. The cinnamon sugar is everywhere, but there’s no cinna-plosion in my mouth. Because I can taste a bit of the oil used, I thought its flavor dulled the sweet seasoning. However, even licking off whatever cinnamon sugar clung to my fingers didn’t have a strong taste.

No dipping sauce comes with them, although I imagine hot fudge or soft serve would pair well. Unfortunately, I read Donut Sticks are only available in the morning so it might be hard to get them with either, but they really should be an all-day thing.

If I had to compare these with Dunkin’s Donut Fries, these are better, but not by a whole lot. They’re thicker because they’re fluffier and airer. They also taste a little bit better, even though I wish the cinnamon sugar stood out more. Although, they do look freaky.

If you order these, don’t let them sit around. Eat them fresh because, just like McDonald’s World Famous Fries, they taste better when they are and have a bit of crispiness that fades if not eaten quickly. If you pick some up via the drive-thru, eat them while you drive, even though there is a 100 percent chance the Donut Sticks are the nimbus clouds that will rain cinnamon sugar onto your crotch.

Although, like most donuts, you could stick them in the microwave for about 10 seconds, to get some of that fresh-from-the-fryer quality back.

Overall, McDonald’s Donut Sticks are decent, if eaten fresh, and slightly less so, if not. They are not at the luscious level as my sorely missed Cinnamon Melts, but if you believe your breakfasts should end with dessert, which they should, this will do an adequate job.

Purchased Price: $2.29*
Size: 6 pieces
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 280 calories, 13 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 15 milligrams of cholesterol, 260 milligrams of sodium, 34 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 9 grams of sugar, and 6 grams of protein.

*Because I live on a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, things are a bit pricier here. You’ll probably pay less than I did.