REVIEW: Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop-Tarts

Kellogg s Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop Tarts

What are Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop-Tarts?

There is one food so glorious that one is willing – happy, even – to buy them from the woman on the grungy subway platform with a Saran-covered baking tray of them teetering atop a granny cart. Churros! If you’ve never had those crusty-on-the-outside, soft inside, star-shaped tubes of fried dough sprinkled with cinnamon sugar, what kind of life are you living?

Well, Pop-Tarts have brought the chocolate-dipped churro experience to the breakfast table, and I, for one, was stoked. They have the standard Pop-Tart pastry envelope with a chocolate-cinnamon filling. There’s even a little curly-bottomed churro dunked in chocolate on the box. Cuuute!

Kellogg s Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop Tarts 2

How is it?

The first glance at these Pop-Tarts did not bode well. They were way too light. Like someone left the Churro Pop-Tarts from the photo on the box out on the window sill all summer in the sun.

Kellogg s Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop Tarts 3

Churros can’t be pale! They should be “golden brown” at least, but I’ll always go for darker churros. Darker = crustier, and I love facing the danger of shredding the roof of my mouth with a dessert food.

Flavor-wise, I can sum it up in one photo:

Kellogg s Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop Tarts 4

Yeah, these taste EXACTLY like the Frosted Brown Sugar Cinnamon Pop-Tarts. I love that flavor, I’ve eaten many of them in my time. But here, I wanted something different. The churro-flavored 2019 Mystery Oreo cookies were SO good – I was hoping these would be at that level or better. They needed to represent that slight savoriness that fried sweet things have.

Kellogg s Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop Tarts 5

Anything else you need to know?

I’m not usually a fan of toasting, but I tried it here (churros are best hot, right?). While it did add a crispiness to the pastry, it did not raise this Pop-Tart to churro-level perfection. However, I decided to lightly brush the pastry with a mixture of water, brown sugar and cinnamon and drop that in the toaster (using a non-stick bag meant for making grilled cheese in the toaster). Once cooled, this hack did give the pastry a granular sugar feel like a churro, and certainly made it look more like something I’d buy on the Atlantic Avenue R train platform.

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Conclusion:

Meh. Just buy the Frosted Brown Sugar Cinnamon ones. They’re easier to find.

Purchased Price: $3.68
Size: 20 oz. box / 16 toaster pastries
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 6 out of 10 (for unoriginality)
Nutrition Facts: (2 pastries) 400 calories, 13 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 330 milligrams of sodium, 68 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 31 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Froot Loops Pop-Tarts

Limited Edition Froot Loops Pop Tarts

Do you hear that?? The music playing that’s growing in volume?

There’s some chanting. Hmmm, interesting, there are also some background noises (maybe a bird of some sort), and what’s this, a sun rising?! Except, it’s rising above a grocery store aisle? Ahhh, I get it now, it’s the Circle of Life breakfast-style!

Around one year ago, Kellogg’s Pop-Tarts made a slight leap down the aisle to the cereal section for a new rendition of Pop-Tarts Cereal. And now it’s coming full circle as a cereal appears in toaster pastry form, namely Froot Loops, in a limited edition flavor. Toucan Sam is of course along for the ride as well to make sure you know it’s official.

Limited Edition Froot Loops Pop Tarts Back of Box

The Pop-Tarts come frosted so that they can be emblazoned with fun designs, six in total, including many representations of the cereal itself. The artwork itself is colorful but the actual images of the cereal pieces are little grainy/pixelated. It seems like they wanted to showcase the true cereal, but the photo-real images are not that amazing, unfortunately. I was excited about the Toucan Sam one, but sadly I went through my entire box and he didn’t make an appearance. Points for the “I’M WITH SAM” one though, like seriously who wouldn’t want to be his friend?

Limited Edition Froot Loops Pop Tarts Printed Frosting

Once I opened the silver inner package of one of these, I got hit with that distinct frooty flavor almost so much I was half-expecting Sam to pop out and slap me in the face with his beak. It’s undeniable and also uncanny how much they smell like their namesake. Follow your nose, indeed! I remember experiencing this same mesmerizing sensation with the donuts from Carl’s Jr./Hardees.

Limited Edition Froot Loops Pop Tarts Split

Breaking open the pastry exposes a delightful pink interior. It’s a light pink that I can best as describe as a color for something that I would expect to be guava-flavored. Impulsive Buy readers, I’m happy to report that, like the donuts, these taste exactly like Froot Loops! That tangy, fruity flavor, which the internet tells me is a mixture of orange, cherry, and lemon is spot-on and intense. Whenever you think the flavor is too much, though, the sugar frosting and pastry crust flies in and offsets it nicely for a well-rounded bite. Good job, Toucan Sam and Kellogg’s, color me impressed.

My one misgiving is that as a Pop-Tart these should be delectable in a variety of prepared temperatures, most notably straight out of the box and once nice and toasty. As mentioned, they are a home run at room temperature but fall woefully short after some heat is applied. Even though the box tells me about all the natural fruit flavors present once toasted, the flavor profile seems to change to something more chemically induced and not as delightful as before. No Bueno.

Nevertheless, if you love Froot Loops, colorful toucans or even the cyclical nature of the world we live in, pick these up, you won’t be disappointed. Just keep them away from your toaster, and let’s hope Kellogg’s continues mining its brands across its portfolio. Eggo-branded limited edition maple flavor Pop-Tarts (with a special edition waffle-y crust), anyone??

Purchased Price: $3.68
Size: 27 oz. box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 pastries) 370 calories, 9 grams of fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 3.5 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 2 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 320 milligrams of sodium, 70 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 30 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Cupcake Pop-Tarts (Frosted Chocolate Cupcake and Frosted Confetti Cupcake)

Cupcake Pop Tarts

The only problems with cupcakes are that they’re not really portable or pocketable.

Yes, you could stick a cupcake in one of those plastic clamshell holders that are specially designed to hold just one of them and carry it around in a bag. But if you don’t want cupcake frosting smearing that clear plastic, you have to be very careful with that bag. No dipsy-doodles. Cupcakes also don’t fit in pockets. Don’t @ me your cleaning bills because you wanted to prove me wrong!

But Cupcake Pop-Tarts are portable AND pocketable. No frosting on plastic to worry about. No Googling to find out how to get rid of cake stains. No worrying about peeling back the foil or paper baking cups. And, no one is going to ask you, “What’s the special occasion?”

Cupcake Pop-Tarts are available in one rehashed flavor — Frosted Confetti Cupcake — and one new variety — Frosted Chocolate Cupcake.

Frosted Confetti Cupcake Pop-Tarts

Frosted Confetti Cupcake Pop Tarts Sprinkles

Frosted Confetti Cupcake Pop-Tarts are 2011’s Frosted Confetti Cake Pop-Tarts with an added syllable. Are they really the same? Well, processed food production has evolved over the years, so I’m sure there might’ve been some tweaks made. I’m 95% sure the 2019 version is not EXACTLY the same as the 2011 version. But I’m 100% sure the Pop-Tarts image used on both boxes are EXACTLY the same. See for yourself.

Frosted Confetti Cupcake Pop Tarts Box

I reviewed the Frosted Confetti Cake Pop-Tarts back in 2011, and I found them to be “yummy enough that I would put them somewhere at the bottom of my list of Top 10 Favorite Pop-Tarts Flavors of All-Time.” Of course, I wrote that a few dozen new Pop-Tarts flavors ago, so that’s no longer the case.

Frosted Confetti Cupcake Pop Tarts Innards

Whether toasted or straight from the foil wrapper, they have a butteriness and sweetness that equates to a flavor that I would consider as “cake.” So much so that if Kellogg’s wants to rename this flavor again, it could call it Birthday Cake (oh wait, it looks like that was already done). So if you’re into birthday cake-flavored products or you REALLY missed Frosted Confetti Cake Pop-Tarts, go and buy a box.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 16-pack box
Purchased at: Received from Kellogg’s
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 pastries) 360 calories, 7 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 440 milligrams of sodium, 70 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 30 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein.

Frosted Chocolate Cupcake Pop-Tarts

Frosted Chocolate Cupcake Pop Tarts Squiggle

This one is, well, chocolatey. It has a chocolatey crust, chocolatey icing with a white squiggle (like Hostess CupCakes), and a sweet white filling.

Unlike Confetti Cupcake, this one’s flavor doesn’t make me think of cake or even a Hostess CupCake. Instead, it reminds me more of other chocolatey Pop-Tarts varieties. Also, I found its chocolatey flavor to be more prominent when the pastry is not toasted.

Frosted Chocolate Cupcake Pop Tarts Innards

Overall, it’s a good non-fruity Pop-Tart, but another aspect of it that disappointed me was the amount of filling in the ones I ate prior to writing this review (which was four). I wish there was more of it because when I bite into these, I don’t feel the filling ooze out a little when they’re toasted, which is one of the best things about eating a Pop-Tart. It’s also the worst thing because if I toasted one, that filling is like lava in my mouth.

Maybe I got a bad box, but having that oozing sensation would’ve been a nice touch and a more accurate representation of what it’s like to bite into a creme-filled cupcake.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 16-pack box
Purchased at: Received from Kellogg’s
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 pastries) 360 calories, 9 grams of fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 410 milligrams of sodium, 68 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 34 grams of sugar, and 5 grams of protein.

Are Frosted Confetti Cupcake and Frosted Chocolate Cupcake Pop-Tarts good?

Yes. And, I’d like to add, they make excellent bread for ice cream sandwiches.

Are they yummy enough that I would put them somewhere at the bottom of my list of Top 10 Favorite Pop-Tarts Flavors of All-Time?

No. But both are definitely in my Top 25.

DISCLOSURE: I received a free samples of the Pop-Tarts. Doing so did not influence my review in any way, although it seems like it. But I assure you it did not.

REVIEW: Kellogg’s Pop-Tarts Bites

Kellogg s Pop Tarts Bites

Do you wake up precisely 43 seconds before you need to be out the door? Or maybe you have a heart condition, and the sudden POP! of the toaster would too much for the ol’ ticker? Or perhaps you don’t like your kids too much, and don’t want to do anything that could be mistaken as cooking for them?

If so, Pop-Tarts Bites are the product for you! Able to go from box to mouth in under 10 seconds, these bite-sized pieces promise the classic Frosted Strawberry or Frosted Brown Sugar Cinnamon flavor without all that tedious toasting.

An even faster, less labor-intensive version of toasted Pop-Tarts may seem like a product in search of a problem, but I’m willing to be convinced. After all, I’m a guy so impatient that I’ve never successfully cooked a TV dinner using the conventional oven instructions. I always get tired of waiting and throw it in the microwave.

Kellogg s Pop Tarts Bites Pouches

I open a pouch of each and stick my nose in deep to sniff that classic Pop-Tart scent of slightly undercooked pastry. The Brown Sugar Cinnamon has an additional spice scent, and the strawberry strongly reminds me of strawberry jam. So far, the experience is identical to regular Pop Tarts.

I pop a Brown Sugar Cinnamon Bite into my mouth, crunch through the frosting, and into the sugary center. These taste like Pop-Tarts. The Brown Sugar Cinnamon Bites have a kick of spice to them, and the Strawberry Bites have a nice tartness, but these are fundamentally the popular toaster pastry.

Kellogg s Pop Tarts Bites Innards

If anything, they’re a bit more monotonous. With a traditional Pop-Tart, you can vary the eating experience by adjusting the amount of filled center vs. unfilled edge in each bite. I know I’m not the only one who likes to nibble away all the edge first, leaving the super sugary center for last. It’s also possible I way over think these things.

For me, the major drawback to these is that they can’t be toasted. While I understand one of the selling points of Pop-Tarts is that they allow you to eat breakfast while still in REM sleep, I’ve always preferred them toasted. Having a “cooked” breakfast will enable me to maintain the facade of being a functional adult. Plus, it gets rid of the aforementioned undercooked dough flavor. A brief 20 second trip in the microwave results in a pillowy crust and warm filling, an improvement, but one not intended by the manufacturer.

Everything you need to know about Pop-Tarts Bites is right there in the name. They’re mini bite-sized Pop-Tarts. They deliver precisely that but don’t add much to the Pop-Tarts Extended Universe.

Purchased Price: $4.98
Size: 10 pouches/box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 pouch) Strawberry – 150 calories, 3 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 29 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 15 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein. Brown Sugar Cinnamon – 150 calories, 3.5 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 29 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 grams of fiber, 15 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Frosted Crisp Apple Pop-Tarts

Frosted Crisp Apple Pop Tarts

What are Frosted Crisp Apple Pop-Tarts?

They’re a Walmart-exclusive variety that’s now a part of the seemingly endless list of Pop-Tarts flavors.

How are they?

Frosted Crisp Apple Pop Tarts 3

Filled with potential but ultimately pretty average. OK, it’s actually filled with apple goo, and that part is tasty. The flavor and consistency reminded me of the hot apple lava that McDonald’s puts in their pies, but not the new, less sugar “healthier” filling it started using a few months ago. It’s more of the previous, full-sugar version.

As an aside, I pity those of you who are not old enough to remember when Mickey D’s would fry their apple pies. Sure, you risked severe burns on the inside of your mouth by eating one, but they were so much better than the baked versions of today.

Frosted Crisp Apple Pop Tarts 2

Back to the Pop-Tarts though, and this version seems kind of like a missed opportunity. Yes, the apple filling is good, but with the standard white Pop-Tarts frosting this doesn’t really distinguish itself from any other regular fruit flavor. Previous members of the apple Pop-Tart family, like caramel apple, cinnamon apple, apple strudel and Jolly Rancher green apple, had something special going on outside with either a flavored and colorful frosting or some type of coating.

This variety is not bad, but maybe the Pop-Tarts people could have tried a little harder to come up with something new and unique. And no, adding “crisp” in front of apple doesn’t count.

Is there anything else you need to know?

It appears that Walmart only offers these in the 16-count “Value Pack” rather than the standard 8-count boxes, so make sure you are prepared for that kind of commitment before purchasing.

Conclusion:

If you are a Pop-Tarts and a crisp apple enthusiast, then you’ll probably enjoy these, but even then it’s unlikely you’ll be itching to stock up before they disappear.

If your goal in life is to try every Pop-Tart flavor ever made, then congrats on setting a pretty awesome goal for yourself and have at it. But if not, there are plenty of other more satisfying and unique flavors out there to try.

Purchased Price: $3.68
Size: 28.2 oz. box/16-pack
Purchased at: Walmart (Exclusive Flavor)
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 pastry) 200 calories, 5 grams of total fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 180 milligrams of sodium, 36 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of dietary fiber, 14 grams of sugars, and 2 grams of protein.