REVIEW: Smucker’s Uncrustables Peanut Butter & Raspberry Spread Sandwich

Folks, it’s peanut butter jelly time.

If the reminder of that dancing banana pre-meme, or “preme,” made you yearn for simpler times, I’ve got something else to tickle your nostalgia bone – PB&Js with the crust cut off.

Ah yes, an absolute staple of every picky child’s diet, and with the advent of Smucker’s Uncrustables, still a staple of this lazy manchild’s lack of one. I buy them in bulk from Costco once a month. In fact, I eat so many Uncrustables, my niece calls me, “Unc Rustable.”

Ok, that’s not true. My niece doesn’t even call me, but if she did, she would probably tell me to stop talking with my mouth full of Uncrustables.

To bastardize the late great Mitch Hedberg’s potato joke, sometimes I’ll just throw a frozen Uncrustable on the counter even if I don’t want one, and by the time it’s done? Who knows?

If you can’t tell, I love Uncrustables, so when I saw a new flavor dropped – Raspberry, I snatched them up faster than you can say, “Get to the review already, dude.”

Do you like grape Uncrustables? Do you like the strawberry one? Guess what? The reign continues. You’re gonna like them in raspberry too.

What can I say? Raspberry is a welcome addition to the line.

They might actually be your new favorite. They aren’t quite my favorite, but that’s no knock. I’d still put them behind grape but ahead of strawberry.

They’re great, but the sweet raspberry jelly flavor pops here just a tad bit more than I’d like. It doesn’t overpower the peanut butter, but it tries. The jelly reminds me of the raspberry filling you would find in Italian bakery cookies, making these lean a little closer to a dessert than an on-the-go mid-day lunch alternative in my mind. That’s fine; I’ll just eat ’em later in the day.

That’s about as much as I can say “bad” about them. These bread pucks should become a regular part of my repertoire. If you’re like me, you prefer your Uncrustables “al dente.” If I’m not taking one with me, I usually eat them after about ten minutes of thawing. Raspberry met my standards here as well. The cold jelly with the half-frozen peanut butter definitely satisfies.

These are a successful expansion. I’d love to see Costco do a three-flavor variety box soon. Beyond that, I’d love Uncrustables to fast-track more new flavors. To take a cue from the dancing banana, how about an Elvis-inspired flavor? Kids love The King! I am not sure about the freezing properties of a banana spread, but they have scientists over at Smucker’s who can surely make it work.

Hey, another Paddington movie is coming down the pike, so hit us with an orange marmalade Uncrustable. Where’s the Fluffernutter one? You make ’em, I’ll buy ’em. I am “Unc Rustable” after all. I should call my niece and let her know Uncrustables now comes in Raspberry.

It’s ringing.

… Straight to voicemail. She’s probably busy.

Purchased Price: $4.79
Size: 8 oz package
Purchased at: Acme
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 210 calories, 9 grams of fat, 2 grams of saturated fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 220 milligrams of sodium, 28 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar, and 6 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Smucker’s Uncrustables Roll-Ups

Smucker s Uncrustables Turkey  Colby Jack Roll Ups

What are Smucker’s Uncrustables Turkey & Colby Jack and Uncured Ham & Cheddar Roll-Ups?

Uncrustables branches out into more than just round crust-less pocket sandwiches with the launch of two new thaw-and-eat roll-ups. One is Turkey and Colby Jack that contains smoked turkey breast, Colby, Monterey Jack, and Neufchâtel cheeses with seasoning in flatbread. The other is uncured ham and cheddar consisting of uncured ham, cheddar, and Neufchâtel cheeses in flatbread.

Smucker s Uncrustables Uncured Ham  Cheddar Roll Ups

How are they?

These are adorable little lunch meat pinwheels, just like if a sushi roll and a sandwich for your lunch box had a baby. Both flavors are presented in perfectly bite-sized morsels and, considering that they were just frozen, the flatbread turns out surprisingly well as it is nice and soft. A little pillowy even!!

Smucker s Uncrustables Turkey  Colby Jack Roll Ups Closeup
Smucker’s Uncrustables Turkey & Colby Jack Roll-Ups Closeup

The components are well balanced here. Flatbread softness comes in upon the first bite, followed by the punch of the cheese. For the Turkey one, the finish is a nice blend of seasoning, definitely an oniony garlic flavor. The ham one doesn’t have any seasoning for some reason, but maybe it’s because the ham’s flavor is stronger and offers a savory, briny ending to the roll.

Smucker s Uncrustables Uncured Ham  Cheddar Roll Ups Closeup
Smucker’s Uncrustables Uncured Ham & Cheddar Roll-Ups Closeup

I was unfamiliar with Neufchâtel cheese before this and couldn’t believe that these contain such a fancy cheese. I’m mean just look at that circumflex!!! (It’s the line above the a so you pronounce it like “ah”) I dissected the roll-up and it has a cream cheese-like consistency and flavor. Without a condiment like mustard or mayo, this helped to give another dimension, a nice creamy aspect, to the whole experience.

Is there anything else you need to know?

Smucker s Uncrustables Roll Ups Wrapers

Lots of directions on these: Keep frozen until ready to thaw. Thaw for two hours, eat immediately. For on-the-go use, include ice pack, eat within six hours. Do not microwave. Do not refreeze once thawed. The most important one is the second one. Make sure you wait a full two hours before indulging. I got a little anxious on these my first try and bit into frozen meat. Not pleasant at all.

These also seem to be a resurgence for the Uncrustables brand. There are two heat and eat options (hyperlink to spotting of those other flavors?) that debuted at the same time. KEEP ‘EM COMING SMUCKERS!!!! Can you let me know why a fluffernutter OG one has not happened yet, though? Thanks.

Conclusion:

I haven’t had Uncrustables in a while, so I was super excited to try these new offerings. And even with my high expectations, I was blown away by them. They are delicious! A perfect little multi-layered snack, and I probably could have downed both boxes if I wasn’t careful.

I have always been a turkey fan over ham so I would have to give that one the edge. Also, the seasoning on that one was a nice touch. You can’t go wrong with either one, though, and I would highly recommend these for kid’s lunch boxes and for all the kid-like adults longing for a scrumptious snack to bring them back to the simple time of their childhood innocence.

Purchased Price: $4.99 each
Size: 7.8 oz. box/3 pouches
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 10 out of 10 (Turkey & Colby Jack), 9 out of 10 (Uncured Ham & Cheddar)
Nutrition Facts: (1 pouch) Turkey & Colby Jack – 190 calories, 8 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 25 milligrams of cholesterol, 450 milligrams of sodium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of dietary fiber, 3 grams of sugar, and 10 grams of protein. Uncured Ham & Cheddar – 190 calories, 8 grams of fat, 4 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 25 milligrams of cholesterol, 470 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of dietary fiber, 3 grams of sugar and 9 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Smucker’s Uncrustables Taco Bites and BBQ Chicken Bites

Smucker s Uncrustables Taco Bites and BBQ Chicken Bites

What are Smucker’s Uncrustables Taco Bites and BBQ Chicken Bites?

Smucker’s Uncrustables is stepping outside of its proven sweet-based lineup and into the savory space with two heat-and-eat “meat in bread” items — BBQ Chicken Bites and Taco Bites. Uncrustables has done grilled cheese before, but now we’re talking full-on USDA approved animal products, ya’ll.

How are they?

First, let’s assume these are targeted toward and made for kids. They have a different palate than (most) adults, so I set my expectations at “they should be as good as any other kid-food option.”

Smucker s Uncrustables Taco Bites 2

I started with the Taco Bites, hoping for that standard taco seasoning flavor and some cheesy goodness since the front of the package said these included cheese. I used the printed microwave heating directions since there weren’t any for a toaster oven.

Smucker s Uncrustables Taco Bites 3

Biting into these was like biting into a black hole. I know my jaw closed, but around what? The bread on the outside was a dry whole wheat bun. There was an aftertaste of taco seasoning like it was a distant childhood memory, but that was about it. The filling-to-bread ratio was way off, with every bite being mostly dry bread followed by a little bit of the beef crumble.

Smucker s Uncrustables Taco Bites 4

For the second bite in the pouch, I tore off the top layer of bread and folded the rest in half to try to simulate doubling the meat filling. This was much better and led to my discovering that the seasoning on the beef itself is pretty good when it’s not battling the flavor sucking sponge of the whole wheat bun prison it’s delivered in. I predict many a kid will eat the yummy filling and leave the bread exoskeleton behind.

Smucker s Uncrustables BBQ Chicken Bites 5

With my expectations significantly lowered, I moved on to the BBQ Chicken Bites. The same microwave directions had my food ready in 40 seconds.

Smucker s Uncrustables BBQ Chicken Bites 6

The bread used in the BBQ Chicken version was SO MUCH BETTER. It was moist (yeah, I said it) almost like a wheat brioche and was an immediate improvement. The filling was too sweet for my BBQ preferences, but, again, assuming this is for kids, I can see why it leaned into sweet BBQ instead of smoky or savory. The poultry pieces were surprisingly large and looked like legit whole shredded chicken breast meat. There was also a definitive sauciness to the inside that was lacking in the taco version.

Is there anything else you need to know?

I mean, they certainly don’t have a crust. Moniker appeased.

Also, I can see where the crazed parent, desperate to get food into their screaming hungry kid’s mouth, would appreciate something that’s pretty impressively balanced in nutrition and ready in 40 seconds.

Conclusion:

I’m always a fan when a brand innovates outside of its proven space. I think these bites, overall, were designed for kids with care and consideration (I mean, only 170 milligrams of sodium in two BBQ Chicken Bites means someone was paying attention when these were developed).

That being said, the Taco Bites have a lot of room for improvement (please switch the bread. PLEASE!) before I’d buy them again. The Chicken BBQ Bites were pretty delicious even for “kid food,” and I’ll be happy to munch on them as afternoon snacks (there’s not enough food to be an adult meal, that’s for sure) until they’re gone.

Purchased Price: $3.99 each
Size: 6 oz. box/3 pouches
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 4 out of 10 (Taco Bites), 7 out of 10 (BBQ Chicken Bites)
Nutrition Facts: (1 twin pack pouch) Taco Bites – 160 Calories, 5 grams of fat, 3 grams of saturated fat, 20 milligrams of cholesterol, 310 milligrams of sodium, 16 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 3 grams of sugar, and 6 grams of protein. BBQ Chicken Bites – 130 Calories, 3.5 grams of fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 20 milligrams of cholesterol, 170 milligrams of sodium, 18 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 5 grams of sugar, and 8 grams of protein.